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Why did the audiophile refuse to eat seafood? Because he heard it was too 'Bass-y' for his taste.
A real knee slapper!!
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What's the first step in curing audiophilia? Stop playing with your Tweeter!
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What's the one advantage of blowing up your tweeter?
You get treble damages.
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What do you call a dog that goes back and forth through the door all the time?
A woofer.
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Audiophiles are like aging actors, they want the (sound)stage all to themselves.
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I honestly never had my jokes met with more awkward silence than on this forum. I gave up a long time ago.
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@grislybutter
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What do you call an audio forum moderator?
Volume control.
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@grislybutter ....
I have laughed at several of your posts ... keep the faith!
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What did the tweeter say to the woofer? Hey baby, I like that bottom end.
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Audiophile #1: "Did you hear the sad news about Bob; he died of a sudden illness."
Audiophile #2: That's so sad. What did he have?"
Audiophile #1: Krell, Wilson, DCS, Transparent cables."
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I didn’t know my bass from my oboe until I became an audiophile.
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Two antennas met up on the roof, fell in love and got married. The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was terrific!
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Thank goodness the equipment is okay.
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Paul Klipsch and Amar Bose see each other from a across the street in heaven. Paul with hands on each side of his mouth yells, "How you doing Amar?"
Amar with his hand 2" in front of his mouth responds, "Pretty good Paul".
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Duirng my most recent checkup at the Dr's office, I was told my blood pressure was too high and was instructed to stop watching cable news.
I cancelled my Audioquest newsletter.
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Two audiophiles are taking a bath. One says to the other, "Where's the soap?" The second audiophile replies, "Sure does."
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@blackbag20
yes! YES! YES!!!!
thank you :)
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Nobody here should quit their day jobs 😎
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@aewarren I don’t get the soap joke.
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@oldrooney The golden-eared audiophile is hard of hearing.
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@jwillox you mean we would suck as entertainers?
NOOOOOOOO 
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@edgyhassle good premise. I think Bose would also speak from the bottom of the pool while his lawyers would turn Klipsch upside down and shake him good to get all his valuables
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What did the amp say to the speaker?
Stop impeding me.
All the best,
Nonoise
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What did the stylus say to the record?
Groovy baby, yeah!
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My dog seems to have lost his voice. He's a subwoofer
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What did the source say to the system?
Playing through.
All the best,
Nonoise
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How do audiophiles congratulate one another?
They give each other hi-fi's.
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@aewarren +1
@grisslybutter You are correct!
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A seasoned audiophile, an electrical engineer, and a strongly-opinionated hifi reviewer walk into a bar ...
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how many audiophiles does it take to change a life bulb?
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It depends on how you define "change":
1. One to change the lightbulb.
2. A dozen to debate whether the new bulb affects the room's acoustics.
3. A few more to compare the warmth and brightness of the old bulb versus the new one.
4. Another group to insist that the lightbulb brand matters for optimal sound quality.
5. Finally, a couple to argue that only an incandescent bulb can produce the true vintage sound experience.
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mine would have been "none, they listened to the music with their eyes closed" but @rhg3 was/were way better
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A CD transport and a streaming server were having an argument over which of them was better.
It was getting very heated until finally the server said to the transport, "Whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you!"
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An audiophile is waiting for his turn behind the curtain at the Comedy Store.
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@grislybutter....
You’re on.... ;)
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Take my turntable.......please.
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I’ve always liked one I saw years ago in Stereophile..
2 friends are discussing ones new speakers..So how do you like them one ask..The new owner replies,I don’t know,they haven’t been reviewed yet...
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I have a friend that writes sings songs about sewing machines.
He's a singer/songwriter
Or sew it seams
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"Strong-Arm" brand tone arms - "You'll like them whether you want to or not."
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S/he has a hissy fit.
It's always a he
He --> His --> Hissy --> Hissy fit (not herry fit)
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Two audiophiles are taking a bath. One says to the other, "Where's the soap?" The second audiophile replies, "Sure does."
Where's the soap? ...10% off at the Brokeback Mountain general store?
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I like this humor from wife thread here Agon. The wife threaten the husband to leave him if he buy one more cd.Later the husband said sometimes he miss his wife.
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