Do You Ever Find Yourself Unable to Listen To Your System?

Of course.

Depression robs the joy out of many things.  

During those periods I tend to watch a lot of mindless television.

Note: in the book iDisorder, I believe by Rosen, there is a direct positive correlation between screen use of all types (phone, computer,  TV, etc.) And depression.  An important read. 

@jay73 - I'm sorry to hear about your current situation. I find that sometimes I loose the will to listen, but I also found that if I will sit down and listen that I will usually find a way of escape, or even better yet, I'll feel better. It happened just today.

@rocray - That is some awesome advice and as you mention some advice of a lifetime has been offered here today by others. There are several persons of faith here that could become a resource for the OP if ever they are so inclined.

Finally it is a breath of fresh air that nearly everyone here has been able to contribute and that nearly no one was offended. That is what makes this country great.

OP, I pray your life issues fall away and you are left with peace and hope and a clear outlook.

@douglas_schroeder

Feel free, even to the point of changing the hobby to something else. You have no mandate from the universe to be an audiophile your whole life. It matters very little if you ever use a HiFi again. Do not let stuff chain you.

I encourage you to invest in things that are eternal, and care less about the material stuff.

and who woulda thought, the best advice from our own dougey ain’t even about gear... seriously... valuable advice we can all be reminded of every now and then  👍👍👍

now if you will excuse me, i need to readjust the bias on my $8,000 tube monoblocks... 🤣🤣🤣

I understand what your going through. Life is extremely hard, I turn my system on every day, but rarely listen to one song. Physically and emotionaly drained, I have no energy. This last year was the worst I ever experianced, and it has not stopped.
 If you have someone to talk things over with, that can help. There is no shame in seeking professional help. Sometimes reading what others say about their simiar situation helps. Know that you are not alone. I pray alot, that helps me. I hope and pray things get better for you. Tom G

I have a couple of go to albums for when times get a bit rough and they usually always get me a few steps up from the bottom of the barrel. Do you have any (for want of a better word) healing music in your collection? Keith Jarrett’s Koln Concert (moans and all) picks me up and there are a few others. Sorry of hear of your family’s situation - hope it improves for you. All the best to you and your family Jay.

OP, you read my mind. This is exactly where I am at. It has been a serious s*** storm for the past several years for me. I don't care so much when I'm the target of the attack. I land on my feet. I went though COVID, a big hit to our family business etc. etc. BUT a recent visit to my daughter and her family bowled me over. My 42 year old son in law was just diagnosed with ALS. My daughter is 36 and they have two small children at home. This seems like life at its cruelest. I am a Christian; however, this shakes my faith. To wrap it and and answer the question; YES, I think I need my rig more than ever. Don't give it up! I would appreciate prayer from any of you inclined to do so. Thank you. Joe

For me, music tends to increase the emotional pain.  When my gf left me a decade or so ago, I surrounded myself w/ music (which did no good, of course--only allowed me to exercise my self-indulgence).  I sensed when I was getting better by the simple fact that when I got in my car, I turned to sports radio rather than throw in a CD. And when home, I could read or work without music in the background.

Try to put on a channel of something where a person chooses the music, even if the quality of the sound is not perfect.  For me, it is XM jazz, channel 67.  Don't listen to the rig, but to the music.
I do hope you can come to terms with your sorrow asap, as I am certain most of us are..

Music is the healer.Everyone has a special Artist and Song that always helps them .If there are times your system bothers you then you need a new system. 

Yes, every year when school is out for summer vacation and my wife is home 24/7.

Hi Jay-

Yes, certainly, we have all been through periods like this or at least most people have.  I have also found that when I'm physically sick - flu, cold, strep - I do not want to listen to music and when I flip on the stereo habitually that is the sign that I'm feeling better.

In terms of mood affecting desire for music, I won't go into the deep advice some are providing - I do think much of it is good advice -- but I will stay a level shallower. I have found that it's not a bad time to look for some music that speaks to your current mood rather than to try to jam in your otherwise favorite genres into a mood where they don't fit.

In other words, if you are having trouble relaxing and experiencing a lot of anxiety, try Indian or Middle Eastern or North African music, or another kind of ambient-related genre. See if you can find something that speaks to you now.

Good luck and hope you are feeling better soon, and that your family issues work out!

...no

More Peace, Pin

Sorry, misc-audio...

That was flip as I didn't read your reasoning for the question.  I suspect how audio formed one's life provides some of the answer.  There was never a time when music wasn't a vital part of my upbringing and lifestyle.  Immediate family and cousins are/were musicians, some professional.  It's akin to breathing for me.  Decades ago, when I had my wife over for the first time, my furniture cushions were placed all over the corners of my sound room, testing.  "She may as well know me as I am."  Also, in this, our first and only house, I chose to select a remote, very difficult cube of a room for a dedicated studio, instead of the larger, more audio friendly family space.  It was the perfect solution for our family.  Moods drive my music selections, tempering my needs on the fly.  Working of my 50th year of sobriety, there, indeed, have been dark times, like most of us.  I suppose music is my drug of choice now, but generally, hangover free unless the Sweetspot Siren takes me deep into the night.    :)

Again, there are wonderful resources available for mental health.  I'm happy to report I've availed myself of them.  Best, Pin

The answer. is yes, it happens to me and in my case it’s a sure fire marker that clinical depression is setting in. 

I cannot tolerate the side effect profiles of antidepressants. The condition is usually concomitant with a lack of physical activity and I self-medicate by reducing the work schedule, getting on my bicycle and getting back to putting in a hundred miles per week.

I’ve gone months not listening to my system. When you get in your 60’s you’ve lots of different priorities. That has nothing to do with your system. It’s not going anywhere. Unless it’s stolen. But I’m home every day. So bring it on, come meet my seasoned .45 from 25 years working the streets. It’s not happenin!

Thanks OP for a really worthwhile topic. I never saw it coming but it has me thinking...

I have 2 general causes for being unable to actively enjoy my system (which for me means playing my music on the HD or youtube at moderately loud volumes):

1 - Emotional issues: pretty much anything that disrupts one's mind & well-being (ie, death of friend or family member; loss of income; real bad news that matters) can take me away from the system. Lack of peace of mind (however temporary) translates into less emotional bandwidth for enjoyment of music

2 - Migraine/tinnitus: both are pretty much constant and get rather bad. When that happens music (either via speakers or headphones) sounds "off"/"wrong" and actually causes head pain. The off/wrong thing is difficult to explain, but when it happens, I just stop trying, 'cause what happens isn't worth it.

Having said that, unless I'm flat-out sick in bed (very rare), I can always enjoy what I'm hearing right now: low volume classical music (streaming radio from Denmark) on my KEF 103.2s in nearfield configuration (right now it's choral/polyphony, my fave for this application). I can't remember a time when this didn't sooth & satisfy my mind...

I have moderate tinnitus but fortunately my mind blocks it out when I'm listening so it never interferes with my desire to listen.

Definitely depression, or on the verge.....live with one who does in a bi-polar fashion.  Not severe, but there are times.....

I hope Jay gleans insight and solace from the overall response from all...and admire how some so quickly stepped up with concern.

Not shrinks, but experience shared and thoughts engendered do count. ;I

I think this thread shows we are ALL broken to some degree. It manifests in each a bit differently, but still exists. To see an outpouring (for the most part) of complete strangers supporting someone struggling speaks volumes to the overall nature of the people here. I would guess we have a “membership” of 99.9% men. We tend to not want to express or show weakness of any kind. It is in our nature. But here we all are doing just that, and being lifted by each other. Bravo!

my mood def affects my enjoyment of music so that when very stressed or feeling low for any reason I tend not to listen to it. Hope you find your way back to enjoy listening again, for me and I'm guessing most other audiophiles out there music is food for the soul. without it I miss the frisson but am unable to experience it when my mood is badly affected, a double edged sword.

I feel sincere gratitude to all responding to OP and to OP for his post. Many of us had/have some similar experiences,. Responding to such kind of question could be more valuable than a technical advise regarding a particular gear. Compassion that you express is important and can well be encouraging and helpful for OP. 

I found it particularly useful to create some kind of intimate (positive) feeling and relation with my audio system. Enjoy both, the SQ and the music. Depending on your mood, try to decide which kind of music may please you. Sometimes I find it calming to listen to silence. 
I have a very specific attitude and relation with each of my (three) audio systems. Independently of the cost of each of them, i enjoy all of them in different ways.  Try to create an intimate relation with your system as if it were a member of your family. Despite  your personal problems, do you still communicate with the members of your family/friends? So do the same with your system.

Dependencies are no good,  but here in this world we always depend on many things (as an extreme example, we even cannot exist without an air - our existence is subject to the environment and one small component of this environment is our audio system). 

To keep things fresh, I dial up either Qobuz or Primephonic and happily choose what musical morsel I might next want to listen to. Will it be something I'm familiar with? Or something/someone I've totally never heard of?  And yes all you literalists, I actually do dial up my choices...on the ethernet-connected payphone/PC presently parked in the parlor.

@geof3 - Agreed

For me, music tends to increase the emotional pain. When my gf left me a decade or so ago, I surrounded myself w/ music (which did no good, of course--only allowed me to exercise my self-indulgence).  

I had an experience like that. My grief had a soundtrack in the form of a playlist loosely based on this album, which I think allowed me to overindulge and prolong the pain. For a long time the first notes would bring me right back into that headspace, and I so put it away for a while.

Then I decided to revisit it, expand the playlist, and now it's just music that I enjoy again. 

But more to the point of the OP, if you are going through a tough period, I think it is important to be in the right headspace to enjoy your system, and not force it. The music you listen to will become entwined with whatever is happening in your life at the same time. As was pointed out earlier, engaged listening is a form of work; budget your energy accordingly. 

The subject has been covered pretty thoroughly above.  I'll simply tell you that yes ..... I have gone weeks without listening when family problems are at a peak.  Right now they are simmering, and my listening has suffered considerably, although I can put the local superb jazz program on FM and get some relaxation.