Please Help Me!!

The devil always has time for idle hands.......
BAH HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Part of what I think is pretty funny is also at least PARTIALLY grounded in reality.

When I joked-around about "Monkey Wards" - back in the 1970's, their "Audio Department" (shelf) was stocked with cheapo clock-radios, boom boxes, and shelf systems from what were then "crap" brands like Samsung and Goldstar.  The brands that we lusted over back then have gone the way of the dinosaur or have been bought and sold...

Fast-forward to present day and Samsung and LG (Lucky Goldstar =  same company with an updated name for those who don't know) are now "premium" brands for a lot of Consumer Electronics.  [How far into the future will it be when old guys will be lusting after "Vintage Tozai, Anjank, Jingsense, etc." equipment?]

@b_limo 
Having been around here since '99 it still cracks me up when people miss the tongue firmly planted in the cheek. Great post for good laugh...now need to clear my sinuses of the coffee that made its way up there.

LOL, OP! Great post. Surprised some took it (are you kidding me?) seriously. Tough crowd, as they say. Or should that be dense crowd?

I wasn’t trying to troll anyone, just thought it was funny. I figured that it was so extremely outlandish that you would know that it was a joke (perhaps a bad one).   It is halfway true of us “consumers” though regarding our expectations :)


Omg though, some of your responses had me in tears I was laughing so hard.

Glenn, you are a kind Gentleman :) no one here with a soul thinks otherwise!

Yogiboy, I will definately be pm’ing you for more info regarding the integrated!  Thank you for actually giving me a recommendation; you were the only one.

Almarg, THANK YOU!! I spent all lastnight researching Lirpa Labs... I am totally surprised that Lirpa Labs is not discussed here more often.  I actually found a pair for sale on-line.  After a 30 minute discussion with the seller,  I decided to buy them.  I’m excited to experience the dynamics of the speaker, which are supposedly out of this world!  (Anyone looking for a good laugh look up Lirpa Labs)

Geeqnr, I will definitely be needing those tubes and, of course, that silver plate wiring.  I’ll be pm’ing you as well.  I’m just hoping that I can afford that cable :-0

Well done, b_limo. Thanks for that. LOL at the sarcasm-impaired. 

Save yourself a lot of money and buy a boom box.

Bose high end.......really?

Parasound.

MacIntosh.. sound not so good and has lights

When you’re set up I have some original release/first pressing/promo 8-track tapes that will make your system sound way better than the original engineers ever imagined.

I would definitely go with tablejocky's suggestion!

I haven't been that entertained in years!

You are beyond help.Its time to get a life!!!!!!

After "If given any other recommendations, I’ll try to explain why my choice is better!", I was already 90% sure this was humor.  Then before I even finished the next sentence, I knew it was!  Pretty clever, and a slight bit subtle; enjoyable.

Ask your friend with the Bose system if you can buy it. And then...you can order the new Bose cracker dispenser specially designed for parrot owners delivered to your door via homing pigeon. Where will high end audio ever stop?

Hit the Goodwill brother....

I have the exact unit you are looking for, but before I disclose the information about the seller, he requires you answer a few questions, as he will only sell to the correct person:

1). What will you be using to elevate your speaker cables?
2). Green or no green pen?
3). Optimus or mangnavox transport?
4). Am5, 901, or icepick to the ears?
5). Timeframe or Soundfield?

If you answer all correctly, I have been authorized to provide the seller’s info (coded of course).

well at least I get a laugh. happy Thursday everyone. 

I'm thinking that the integrated amplifier the OP settled on may have been the one that was produced by Lirpa Labs. An indication of that may be the reference in his post to "April."

Although come to think of it, I believe that estimable firm unfortunately went out of business prior to 1996.

Regards
-- Al :-)

That *was* a pretty funny OP :)

@glennewdick- Hopefully, being helpful will never go out of style, even if in response to a joke. You did increase the thread’s fun!

Jump on a Bose system mr big joker!!!

@geeqner- Some of that older, "esoteric" stuff, is very hard to improve upon, if upgraded. Some would be really surprised, at what one can accomplish(SQ-wise) with $1500, thoughtful choices, a soldering iron and a few carefully selected passive components(caps, resistors, rectifiers, etc). Then again; were you to refresh the electrolytics, in your NAD’s phono and preamp sections, it would probably save you from desiring something else, for awhile anyway. I don’t think I ever/even knew Monkey Wards HAD an Audio Dept!   Did I miss anything?  Happy listening!

Yes, it was the mention of Bose that gave the game away.

I really wanted to be sarcastic but what if this OP is serious and just doesn't know. so I stuck that in there to be nice'ish. we can not be too elitist or we scare away the new and uneducated future audio people.  that said i hope its not a joke or it seems I'm a sucker. oh well not the first time or last i suppose.  hay i got an 8wpc SET i'm selling haha.

touche! rodman....

Let’s just agree that I started poking-around on here and was surprised at what people are asking for anything that seems to be halfway decent / charging for some often very old and esoteric stuff.

I’m working my way up to it - but around here, it seems like spending a grand and a half (which is hard for some of us married guys to scrape-up) is almost "chump change"....

[And my favorite hangout was actually "monkey Wards"...]

But it was really intended to be a sarcastic poke at a humorous OP

Just keep in mind; that last rant/screed came from one(geeqner) that’s hesitant to spend ANY money, to upgrade from using an 80’s NAD receiver’s preamp and phono sections. I’ll bet Radio Shack WAS their favorite hangout!

That cheered me up. Glen, well done. I was almost going to tell the OP to go to audioka....

Sorry -

But unless you plan to spend at least 5 to 10 thou per component - most here on A-gon will not be able to help you [let’s see, an integrated = (1X Pre + 1X Power +1X EQ +1X Tuner) X 5 thou each = you should be spending at least $20thou]

Also - be sure that it incorporates a Point-Wired assembly method and uses Vintage tubes obtained from the Gunnery Control computers from a WWII-era Naval Destroyer (the concussion from the 5-inch shells immoliates the electron-gathering surfaces within them in a way that fully opens the soundstage...[Provided that the ship in question fired between 227 and 342 volleys whilst the tubes were installed and optimally that they were then stored in a Tropical climate]) The REAL trouble is that the tubes and circuit designs in question are still "classified" - but I know a guy who knows a guy...

Oh, and be sure to spend at least TWICE that on the requisite power conditioner and silver-plate speaker wires and interconnects that are purified from a single crystal by drawing them across the pubic mound of a 75 year-old virgin from Micronesia and then cryogenically quenching them in a pool of unicorn urine cooled by circulating it through liquid Helium to a temperature of EXACTLY -244 degrees Kelvin...

In short - just have your parrot go to Radio Shack... (oh, wait - they don’t exist anymore)

hilarious..I am guessing everyone figured out this is a Jester Post?

What’s ever funnier: glennewdick took it SERIOUSLY(HILARIOUS)!

I think the giveaway was "he owns a pretty high end bose sound system so he is indeed qualified."

+1 tablejockey's suggested component,lol!Does it come in bright green too?

I have a friend that has a nice integrated amp that he will sell to you. The only problem is it was built April 26, 1996 . The power output is 168 watts. The amp weighs 28 pounds and the volume control is in the middle. It sounds like crap but it has plenty of lights. The remote was lost years ago . If you are interested in this rare beauty give me a call!!

1-800-GOT-JUNK

Wow this is a big bad JOKE!!!!

I smell a rat.

some readers just can't be helped...

No, it's not a double post.

You said someone told you that a golden age of mid-fi were between 1996 to 2002 and you clearly stated that this person owns high end Bose system. First of all, Bose isn't high end. Bose isn't hifi at all, not even mid-fi. Bose isn't for audiophiles. 

Me thinks we’re being trolled. 

Yes, it's a joke, but it would be great if there was a search engine where we could enter any detail we wanted (no matter how weird) that generated a list of products that fit our parameters

some readers just can't be helped...

Sorry, is this a joke? Actually, it’s a compilation of several jokes, some funny, some not so much....

Firstly, April 27, 1996 to May 23, 2002. being the golden age is a load of BS. Not sure who told you that but they are not giving you good advice. 

Second your speakers say in the back they can handle max 170watts this is in no way any indication of amp power needed. its a general guide to let you know what can potentially damage your speakers. 

You need to know what the load of the speakers are this will be in ohm's common speakers loads are 8ohms and 4ohms note this is nominal as the load changes with different frequencies but not a big concern for you to worry about. knowing the load will help with power requirements and type of amp that can drive them. (tube amps don't like low loads for example)

Also you need to know the sensitivity of your speakers this is stated in db's speakers commonly range from 84db to 95db with some on the extremes like horns that can go up to 150db easily. The higher the sensitivity the less power you will need. I drive my speakers for example with 8watts my speakers are 95db sensitivity. 

 sensitivity is usual rated by applying 1 watt of power with a microphone 1 meter form the speaker to measure the sound output so for example a 88db sensitivity speaker with one watt driving it will make 88db of sound pressure at 1 meter from the speaker. 

So if we know what speakers you will be driving that would help much better to match an amp to them. the speaker amp interface is one of the critical things in audio replay. And you may not need much power at all if they are sensitive or you may need more if not. 

you should also know you could run 1000w into a speaker with no issues most speaker damage is from too little power as the amp will run out of power and start to clip this is a type of distortion that happened when an amp is driven past its rated power this is very damaging to speakers particularly tweeters. Yes if you have lots of power and turn it up to ear bleeding levels you can damage the drivers, but this is less common then under powered clipping damage. Unless your a teenager who need to make sound in a house party I would not worry about too much power. 

One more thing to consider is more people keep their electronics indoors then outdoors so humidity should not be too big a concern to you (also electronics tend to generate heat). Just find something you like and check the condition. Most electronics  face plates and nobs are made from Aluminum so corrosion is less of a concern and can be cleaned up easily more concern is with older gear and the aging components inside like capacitors. These can be replaced though so vintage gear should not scare you. 

See if you have a vintage audio shop in your local area that would be a good place to start. also There are some fantastic 70's and 80's amps out there you should also consider. brands like Luxman, Sansui, Marantz are a couple off the top of my head that were very well built. 

Lastly you may just want to buy new with out knowing your budget its hard to recommend much but there are some very good new integrated amps out there that are way better then anything built in the 90's. We are living in an audio resurgence so take advantage of some of the technological advancements. Class D amps for example are very powerful and make little heat and weigh much much less then older design. 

Ok I've run on here a bit but I hope I educated and helped you somewhat. 

glen 

You're  clearly a discerning audiophile. 

Look for one of these, and you can sit back and just enjoy.

https://images.search.yahoo.com/images/view;_ylt=Awr9JhUlUUxdZswAeRuKnIlQ;_ylu=X3oDMTIyNGJpZmhoBHNlY...

Oh, I almost forgot, I only want to buy an integrated that was in a lower humidity climate so that I don’t have to worry about rusty knobs.  And if possibly, I’d like to make this purchase by paying half via pay-pal, a quarter via cashiers check, and the remaining balance will be paid by me, via cash, in person.  Taking this into account, lets not look further than 10 hours drive at 80mph from 80920.  My days off are Monday, Thursday and every 3rd saturday so the seller will need to be willing to work around my schedule, otherwise no go.  Original packaging is a must, unless they don’t have it, in which case some styrofoam peanuts placed inside the unit, under the case, in order to protect all the electrical thingies inside will suffice.