Good old days

Don’t do it.  Don’t chuck the stereo away.  I moved to Germany for a few years to work there.  I left the stereo system packed away and used a Sony receiver for 2 1/2 years.  I even bought some B&W P6 speakers in downtown Stuttgart and I liked them.  (In a coyote ugly sort of way).  Once back home with my stereo the sound was glorious!  I had sure missed my stereo.

It can get expensive, but the best thing is to get out and hear some other systems- either in people’s homes or at some stereo shops.  Get an idea what you like and try to match that sound in your home system. Plenty of tips and tricks on these forums.  Sometimes the little things can make a big difference.

For many years in the past I would think about what a new amp, turntable or speaker would sound like while listening to music.  That is not very satisfying.  So first thing in my retirement I visited a few shops and Axpona and then I broke open the piggy bank and revamped the whole thing.  Now I’m like a kid at Christmas every time I turn on the stereo- for now…

@frogman

I can see how involving myself in musical endeavors might get me more involved in the music.

yogiboy and Hilde45,

Listening to a speaker that doesn’t do “magic tricks” with soundstaging might well be the way to go. Getting my mind off of the artifacts of sound can only be a good thing in listening to MUSIC.

First, I want to applaud you for posting about this issue. It's a vulnerable topic to post about, and given some of the replies that emerge on this forum, you take risks in order to hear from others. Bravo.

As you know, given your education, most of the music enjoyed in the world and, over time, has been experienced in ways that would not be defined as "serious listening." One thinks of the salons of Europe, table music, liturgical music, tribal music, party music, driving music, cooking music, romantic music. Yes, there are occasions when attention is paid in analytical or serious or immersive ways, but those are not the rule, those are exceptions.

For me, your question branches in two directions:

1. Can you divorce your own attitude about music from its monogamous commitment to "serious" listening? It sounds like you need a way to "flip a switch" — or as we used to say, "chill out," when desired.

2. What might you add or change in your system to help with #1? I think the suggestion of different speakers might be the way to go.

I recently listened to some Stenheim speakers. They were quite amazing, and did some things my speakers (1/10th the cost) couldn't do. But more than anything else, this system was different. It was "fine dining" as opposed to a delicious "home cooked meal." I like the latter, better — comfort food and comfortable circumstances — all done with care, excellently. 

Maybe that's what you really want to move to — aural comfort food, done well.

rvpiano, I can relate. When you read reviews, a good sound system is supposed to have a wide soundstage, depth, layering, etc. So when we listen to our own systems we tend to listen for those things, cause we get programmed to do so. However, we don't care about those things with car stereos, portable players, etc. I often admire how good my Alexa speaker sounds. I don' worry about how it sounds because I don't expect much. Not the case when you spend thousands on a sound system.

I think you’re on the right track.  
I pity the fool who sacrifices the beauty, wonder, and splendor of music to obsess over Audio Nervosa.  
If that is indeed the case, screw it.  
Life’s too short.  Music is too good.  
Good sound is good and all, but it’s not better than music.

I don’t mean to burst your bubble. But before you hang up your HI-FI boots you might want to consider a different type of speaker. A simple British 2 way BBC design might be the ticket. Spendor, Harbeth, Graham are some that just might get you off the Merry-Go-Round that you have been on all these years!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqFIaiPT_kY

@frogman 

I believe that formal analysis can detract from musical enjoyment. I believe one intuitively analyzes by extended listening.
I probably misled by using the term “casual listening”. A better term is relaxed listening. Certainly being actively involved in the music is paramount. That is achieved best when I’m relaxed. 
‘Although I have a Masters in piano from Juilliard and a PhD in music theory and history from NYU, I got my musical inspiration and love of classical music as a child listening to radio stations in New York. I always endeavor to recover that feeling. 
  Expressing myself through this forum has been helpful to me in diagnosing the pitfalls of sound addiction.  I also hope it relates to others who have the same experience.
  

rv, based on the impression left from reading your posts you are clearly a true music lover. You have started several threads which address essentially the same conflict that you struggle with as described in this OP. You clearly struggle with this issue, I first became aware of this conflict when you posted a comment about a recording of a performance that I recommended on your thread of (if memory serves) Mahler, “Das Lied…”. The discussion had been about great performances of this work, not SQ. Yet, I was surprised (to say the least) that you found the recording to be “unlistenable” due to the quality of the sound. An amazing performance with SQ that, to me, on a scale of 1-10 is a 6, maybe even a 7.  Certainly high enough to let the music carry the day in spite of less than fantastic SQ.

IMO, you don’t need to give up your stereo.

In another recent thread you described how you enjoy music more when listening “casually” and not analyzing the sound, I found this curious. Music can be enjoyed to its fullest, not by “casual” listening, but by serious listening…..to the music, not the sound. You, like many of us audiophiles have a penchant for analyzing. So, why not scratch the analysis itch with the music instead of the sound? My suggestion would be to take a course or more on music theory, orchestration or music history, dig deep into the history of favorite composers. There is so much to learn that one can’t learn from liner notes. You play piano. Start taking lessons again. Some feel that analysis of the music detracts from the emotional involvement, I believe that is nonsense. The more one learns about music the more one enjoys it.

Good luck.

Someday it will all click into place. What I found was it's not the investment made but that one piece of kit that brings it all together. 

All the best,
Nonoise

Then there are some of us that have a hard time keeping our focus on the music.

Some of us have arrived at the point where we no longer obsess over SQ and love all the audiophile cues that comprise this hobby.

All the best,
Nonoise

I’m unhappy with my penchant for obsessing over SQ, I don’t obsess when listening to the car stereo. I can just sit back and enjoy the music.
Makes me want to consider giving up high end listening at home and go for something simple (even though I have over 20K invested at this point.)

I don’t think I’ll go through with it, but it’s an idea.

@rvpiano What do you mean "when you were happy"?  Are you not happy now?

I would enjoy both listening in the car, and your home system. That's what I do.