Wellfed, do I really sound like the mythical Slartibartfast? you don't say! I feel so deeply honored! Did old Slarti also believe that Radionic innovation rests at the intersection of invention with insight? You see, we are moving rapidly towards an on-demand services model for ancillary devices in the high end, and through WMC Mr. Kait can be at the front of this portentous shift in market modality. Think of it, better sound for everyone, whoever you are, wherever you are, whatever your system is, whatever your preference, from the convenience of your own armchair. Don't you think the business model has merit? Wouldn't you want to be part of this profound societal shift?
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Of course I did. . . I have not heard of this particular sage, so I thought that perhaps Slartibartfast may be as myself, a follower of the great encyclopedic scholar from Appenzell (CH)--that is Dr. Prof Aloysius Qwantz Schmaltzenstein-Gavronsky, renowned author of the monumental Satura Et Fictitia. |
Line, I did Google your phrase and then ended up reading a long interview with Deepak Chopra. Here is a quote from his discussion that I thought was most relevant to our discussion of the Clever Little Clock: "All technologies are based on the overthrow of the superstition of materialism in the world of technology. The next step is to realize that these so-called fields of force, or information, are actually fields of intelligence and knowledge. Because when information is self-referring, in that it has a feedback loop that influences its own expression, then you cannot just call it pure information. Everybody understands information in todayÂ’s information age. But the next step in the evolution of this knowledge is to understand that it is not just information, it is intelligence, it is knowledge, it is consciousness. The force fields of nature are force fields of consciousness." |
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So profound Audioari1! The mystical triad formed by audiophile, CLC and system form a node of consciousness in the universal mentation of the Cosmos. A higher dymensional atemporal transcendent neuron tuned to the will/need of the imperfect sapiency of its human and euclydian subcomponent. The CLC is the pivotal element or Radionic lens which focuses your spiritual conception of musical truth onto the audio system. In turn the system amplifies the human-generated stimulus received through the subtle force fields in the cosmic 4th dymensions and projects it back to you to complete the triad of self amplifying beauty and while it does so it increases the Glory of the Cosmos with the newly radiated Quantum of freshly created sapient mentation. Not very difficult after all. I contend though that the CLC containing only a 4-bit processor, originally designed only for time-keeping, is in fact ill-suited for the purpose. That is why, as Machina Dynamica does not appear to be interested in the expanded project, I have decided to create a WMC (Web Master Clock) of my own and offer its service to a few extremely carefully selected audiophiles. I will know within a few days how many users can be supported simultaneously and safely by my system without disrupting the multidymentional continuum which could potentially collapse entire clusters of nodal higher consciousnesses with unpredictable results down in Euclydian space. |
Golly gee Guido, can the WMC give me a ride all the way to Mars? Could it really make my old desktop radio sound like a ten foot tall Bose? Last, I'm afraid to ask because it's too much to hope for. Will the WMC allow me to go back in time.......to my childhood? There was this wonderful girl in 8th grade named Barbara and she had very long legs and she used to sit.............Well, I'll tell you when I get back. |
Good point Albertporter, the WMC of course works through the well known/proven audiophile-grade krypto-tachions engine. Yes, it will let you get back in time, although that will require some extra programming to accomodate those long legs of her. Now about Mars travel. . . that would be very unethical on my part. . . first of all there is no breathable air on Mars, so you would be rather uncomfortable, secondly my friends at NASA would not appreciate the competition. . . it's kind of a conflict of interest thing for me, I hope you understand my rather delicate spacy position. |
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Elizabeth, your initiative to assist with 'Faith-based Audiophilia' is very laudable. Pray-for-sound is truly the same as putting your astral self in touch with the cosmic weltgeist predicated through WMC. In fact, I will here announce that I will refill any of your pray-for-sound Clever Little Bottles (CLB) through the pan-dymensional transferrance of WMC for only $299 USD (+ shipping and handling, that is). And your customers won't even have to ship me their bottles for refill. I'll do everything through Astral subtle fluid superdynamics. completely safe, completely wireless. |
Guidocorona, LOL! However, it is well known that Mr. Barris is in possesion of the Gong of Teng-Boche, thought to be one of the Stargate Temporal Displacement Portals made famous in film and television. While I would agree with you re: Barris' documented audiophobia, his choice of gongage leads one to believe that he may be one of the enlightened ones. |
hrrrrumpf, he also stated in his own unauthorized memoirs that he may have been a sanctioner for a domestic intelligence agency that shall remain nameless in this thread. There are rampant rumors that some of the sanctionees were closet audiophiles. . . and these suffering people were processed before audiolib could restore humane dignity to them. No credibility I tell you! |
Hmmm, methinks thou dost protest too much. I remember when this "memoir" you refer to was published. I remember hearing about the shocking revelations revealed that may or may not have ocurred. I would ask you then: If the enlightened Mr. Barris has no credibility, how is it that you have managed to obtain so many details on his life and career? Could it be that you yourself were a sanctioner for this nameless intelligence agency? Or, is it that you are one of the remaining embittered sanctionees? Reveal yourself, sir!! If you dare... |
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there is a competing product, the clc -- clever little cheddar -- its a block of cheese, you put it on top of your amp, as it heats and melts, it sucks distortion out of your equipment like a sponge...provides a great black background, lowers the noise floor and gives the room a pleasing odor...can also double as a vibration dampener or burger enhancer |
Slipknot1, I am deeply offended Sir, and demand immediate satisfaction! Your choice of weapons. . . CLC (Clever Little Cheddar) or CLRG (Clever Little Ripe Gorgonzola)--at least 10 times the stink. First man to faint after applying the cheese-wheel to his tubes loses the duel! Elizabeth, an LTD partnership is an excellent idea. . . we [can corner the market on Ethereal and Faith-Based sound enhancers. Machina Dynamica will have to concede defeat in this arena! |
Hmmm...humor's becoming rather 'smelly' of late, maybe that gong was indicative of an expiration date's being passed... Here's something funnier, Mr. Kait's "definitive explanation" for how the "Intelligent Chip" is supposed to work. After wading through all the pseudo-quantum gobbledygook (not an easy task, since it seems to have been written mainly with confusion and obfuscation in mind), it basically boils down to the assertion -- rather mundane in fact, were the alleged vector of causation not so fantabulous -- that placing the I.C. atop a player spinning a CD for 2 seconds will clarify the optical properties of the disc's polycarbonate layers and thereby "improve" its sound, forever. Naturally, no actual evidence is offered in support of what ought to be an eminently measurable phenomenon -- if it existed -- and so far as I could tell, the argument presented neglects to actually specify, despite its length, exactly how the means described is supposed to alter the polycarbonate for the better (among other logical flaws). After you've attempted to digest this nonsense, I suggest following one of the links Mr. Kait has conveniently listed at the bottom and read the Wired Magazine article for an interesting and cleansing chaser (coincidentally enough, it contains a metaphor comparing one of the discussed technologies to CDs superceding vinyl records). Now, I'm no quantum physicist (and neither is Mr. Kait, with his claimed undergrad engineering degree), so I'm not going to pretend to qualify his rambling, cobbled-together "theory", but it did occur to me that some of the technical articles referenced contain email addresses, and I could write to some of the scientists whose work is cited and see if they might agree to check out the article and offer their expert opinions on the validity of Mr. Kait's expropriations... |
i find the clc clock makes a good timer when using the clc cheddar version while making omlettes, particulaly the bacon cheddar omlette, something about the clocks wave pulses that makes the bacon crisp better and the fat drip off... when i take the clock out of the kitchen, my eggs seem to run and my bacon is limp?!? |
Wow, what a tremendous paper that was Mr. Kait. It looked to me like a pastiche of legitimate materials from disparate sources, tenuously bound by new age ramblings, intentional obfuscations and ill disguised misdirections, with a touch of abuse of inductive logic for good measure. And to top it all off. . . the introduction of a brand new product. . . the Intelligent BOX. . .Let's go get it folks, this one just got to be even better than the CLC! Or is it Lindberger which I am smelling? Or is it just a pedestrian overgrown rodent? Laser light leaking out of CD players. . . . . . Billions and billions of photons bouncing off the walls and plunging miraculously into the Intelligent IC where they get [{perhaps sexually} entangled with coherent photons that got emitted by a couple hundred quantum emitting somethings that then shift toward the blue light and so they go back inside the CD player box because now everything affects everything else because particle entanglement says so than like it goes inside the policarbonate of the CD and like it becomes like real transparent like but it is more like an atomic bomb of light because it's really a photon chain reaction but the new Intelligent box is even more better because it is sealed but not quite and it has its own real laser not like that old IC before because that one had a pretend laser only because it had no power but may be only some tiny batteries but we are not quite sure of that but now it does not matter but the Intelligent box is bigger and does not run out of steam and it's real good and. . . it superimposes quantum states like the poor cat in Schrodinger's old box that was not dead nor it was alive but it was kind of something like both {and probably real pissed off because old Schrodinger was just farting around with equations and couldn't give a rat's ass about the feelings of his quantumly entangled felines} . . . Oh just give me a bleeding break! This is the biggest pile of truly entertaining hogwash I have read in quite a spell! PS: ramblings in curly braces {} are purely my own and are not intended to be paraphrases of concepts or thoughts expressed in Mr. Kait's excellent paper. |
"Albertporter I wonder if the cat in Schrodinger's box had a clever little clock so he could estimate how long before he went to the place with milk rivers and slow mice?" I see a stapler in front of me and you do not, now I see the stapler because of three things, stapler/source, light/medium, and a detector/brain. Without all three, the stapler is not a fact. If I leave the room, the stapler is no longer a fact,; I may have memory of the stapler, but that memory of the stapler is not the stapler; the stapler is no longer a fact to the brain, it is just a memory of the fact of the stapler. It would be the same if became dark, the stapler is no longer a fact. And if stapler is no longer there, the stapler is no longer a fact. I don't think that this is philosophical. It is the known that is the blindfold which is thought born of memory. I is the past that is the blindfold. Now if someone says that the observer is the observer; that would be philosophical untel it is seen as a fact, than it is no longer philosophical. But it is the known that is the blindfold which is thought born of memory. I is the past that is the blindfold. |
The pleasure was all mine Geoffkait. Even the great Schmaltzenstein could not have written a more entertaining piece. He may want to invite you to republish it in the next edition of Satura Et Fictitia. Pehari, it really depends what you want to purchase, the original CLC, Intelligent Chip, Intelligent Box, and Brilliant Pebbles are sold by Machina Dynamica. The WMC server-based audio enhancing service is offered by me at an introductory price of $99 per month, or $999 for a full 1 year subscription. Elizabeth will tell you everything about herPrayForSound faith-based offering. Finally, audiophile-grade cryo-treated Lindberger is offered by Albert Porter's new company AudioUsmatics(from the latin verb usmo, --as, usmavi, usmatum, usmare [to smell]) in quantum-enhancing 1/4 ounce packets for $499 each. Hope this helps. |
No danger of that Joey, Audio Usmatics has patented a quantum cryo treatment for audiophile-grade ripen cheese and salted anchovy products that freezes the material only in the 4th and 5th dymention using hard shunted Neodymium ultramagnets anodized in the far ultraviolet through Cherenkov radiation capacitors. Scientific research at Bonair College proves definitely that moldering cheese and little putrescing fishes thus treated increase both in density and pungency by a factor of 3.141527. |
PFO review (if we can call it that) of the CLC, with it's inescapable implication that the review system had always sounded like caca until the day the CLC showed up...I'm holding out until this fine work of masquerading fiction gets featured on Oprah. PFO review of another Peter Belt related product (with link to Belt website), logically contradicting the above-noted implication by virture of its earlier publication date. But this reviewer Carol Clark is nothing if not consistent (and suggestable). PFO defense of the place of faith in the audio religion Spaghetti monsters? Do they fly out of the butt? |
Zaikesman, the stuff you posted from PFO strains my credulity. I think of myself as empirical in the best sense of the word and that hearing a difference in an A/B demonstration is sufficient. Peter Belt's stuff, however, has never been available to me to complete such tests, so I have never tried any. I cringe when I read some reviews which ask for leaps of faith and merely trying the products. I heard the very positive impact of the IC in a demo at CES and have been using these since. I assume there is a scientific benefit to why they work and have made no great effort to keep up with the interplay between mystic explanations, scientific explanations, and simplistic criticisms of both by pseudo-scientists. But the pen is just going too far. The CLC, is somewhere in between. I had hoped for a demo at CES and understand why there was none. With the number of credible people embarrassing it, however, I may venture forth. With the Bent pen, however, there is little chance. |
