So are your novelty products Mr. kait. |
From reading several threads on the CLC, I am making the hypothesis that the device is based on Radionics principle. This discipline was theorized and put first into practice by Dr. Albert Abrams (1863 - 1924), and later further developed by other alternative health practicianers. In recent times the same subliminal space structure has also been called the Web Effect. According to radionic principles, all visible matter is immersed in a 'fluid' of 'subtle energy fields) or 'subtle frequencies' that govern its outward state. These field cannot be seen nor measured by classical scientific probes or engineering instruments, but can be detected, measured, then modified by a practicianer, usually but not necessarily, through the aid of a focusing or conduit device.
Interestingly enough, as the triad of practicianer, conduit and target subject do not operate at a level of classical physics, but through higher-dymensional 'subtle energy' transfers, neither the gross physical properties of the conduit device (such as the CLC) nor the spatial orientation of the triad, nor the type or degree of connectivity between the interacting components )(audiophile, CLC, audio system) have any real bearing with the induced results, as it is said that Radionics can operate with thousands of miles of separation between the components. Furthermore, as AudioAri1 aptly implies, if the CLC were in fact a Radionicsor web-effect -driven device, it would cause time distortions, translations, or cancellations, as its higher-dymensional principle of operations would bypass the strictures of classic space. Hence no need of cumbersome connectivity between CLC and equipment, nor in fact need of line-of-sight operation. I venture to say that Mr. Kait could easily create a more powerful version of the CLC, perhaps to be dubbed a CMC (or Clever Master Clock, or more accurately the WMC (Web Master Clock)) to reside permantly on his premises. The device would in principle be able to influence any audio system against which it was directed to operate by Mr. Kait. In this configuration and business model Mr. Kait could operate the CMC as a service to audiophiles based on a monthly or annual subscription. Audiophiles would also benefit from any enhancements Mr. Kait made to the WMC without the bother of having to send their own devices back for upgrade. It is worth pointing out that space invariance and insensitivity in Radionics was discovered and put into practice already in the distant 1930s. |
Zaikesman, of course the theory of 'Intelligent Design' is utterly incorrect. Based on Radionics and Web Effect, the world is neither based on intelligent design, nor it is based on trite causality and Gouldian Punctuated Equilibrium, but it is based on sublime Wishful Thinking, according to which. . . "1000 hopeless fantasies make up one solid Reality!"
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Wellfed, do I really sound like the mythical Slartibartfast? you don't say! I feel so deeply honored! Did old Slarti also believe that Radionic innovation rests at the intersection of invention with insight? You see, we are moving rapidly towards an on-demand services model for ancillary devices in the high end, and through WMC Mr. Kait can be at the front of this portentous shift in market modality. Think of it, better sound for everyone, whoever you are, wherever you are, whatever your system is, whatever your preference, from the convenience of your own armchair. Don't you think the business model has merit? Wouldn't you want to be part of this profound societal shift? |
Of course I did. . . I have not heard of this particular sage, so I thought that perhaps Slartibartfast may be as myself, a follower of the great encyclopedic scholar from Appenzell (CH)--that is Dr. Prof Aloysius Qwantz Schmaltzenstein-Gavronsky, renowned author of the monumental Satura Et Fictitia. |
So profound Audioari1! The mystical triad formed by audiophile, CLC and system form a node of consciousness in the universal mentation of the Cosmos. A higher dymensional atemporal transcendent neuron tuned to the will/need of the imperfect sapiency of its human and euclydian subcomponent. The CLC is the pivotal element or Radionic lens which focuses your spiritual conception of musical truth onto the audio system. In turn the system amplifies the human-generated stimulus received through the subtle force fields in the cosmic 4th dymensions and projects it back to you to complete the triad of self amplifying beauty and while it does so it increases the Glory of the Cosmos with the newly radiated Quantum of freshly created sapient mentation. Not very difficult after all. I contend though that the CLC containing only a 4-bit processor, originally designed only for time-keeping, is in fact ill-suited for the purpose. That is why, as Machina Dynamica does not appear to be interested in the expanded project, I have decided to create a WMC (Web Master Clock) of my own and offer its service to a few extremely carefully selected audiophiles. I will know within a few days how many users can be supported simultaneously and safely by my system without disrupting the multidymentional continuum which could potentially collapse entire clusters of nodal higher consciousnesses with unpredictable results down in Euclydian space. |
Good point Albertporter, the WMC of course works through the well known/proven audiophile-grade krypto-tachions engine.
Yes, it will let you get back in time, although that will require some extra programming to accomodate those long legs of her. Now about Mars travel. . . that would be very unethical on my part. . . first of all there is no breathable air on Mars, so you would be rather uncomfortable, secondly my friends at NASA would not appreciate the competition. . . it's kind of a conflict of interest thing for me, I hope you understand my rather delicate spacy position. |
Elizabeth, your initiative to assist with 'Faith-based Audiophilia' is very laudable. Pray-for-sound is truly the same as putting your astral self in
touch with the cosmic weltgeist predicated through WMC.
In fact, I will here announce that I will refill any of your pray-for-sound Clever Little Bottles (CLB) through the pan-dymensional transferrance of WMC
for only $299 USD (+ shipping and handling, that is). And your customers won't even have to ship me their bottles for refill. I'll do everything through Astral subtle fluid superdynamics. completely safe, completely wireless. |
Slipknot, I protest! Chuck Barris has no credibility. His gong is far below audiophile grade. . . besides he admitted in his unauthorized autobiography of having anti-audiophilic leanings. |
hrrrrumpf, he also stated in his own unauthorized memoirs that he may have been a sanctioner for a domestic intelligence agency that shall remain nameless in this thread. There are rampant rumors that some of the sanctionees were closet audiophiles. . . and these suffering people were processed before audiolib could restore humane dignity to them. No credibility I tell you! |
Slipknot1, I am deeply offended Sir, and demand immediate satisfaction! Your choice of weapons. . . CLC (Clever Little Cheddar) or CLRG (Clever Little Ripe Gorgonzola)--at least 10 times the stink. First man to faint after applying the cheese-wheel to his tubes loses the duel!
Elizabeth, an LTD partnership is an excellent idea. . . we [can corner the market on Ethereal and Faith-Based sound enhancers. Machina Dynamica will have to concede defeat in this arena! |
And sunrise it shall be. . . On Garde Monsieur! may your amp be hot, your cheese be ripe, and your olphactory nerve be deadened! AlbertPorter will administer a bottle of BLSS (Brilliant Little Smelling Salts) to the vanquished to revive him. |
Wow, what a tremendous paper that was Mr. Kait. It looked to me like a pastiche of legitimate materials from disparate sources, tenuously bound by new age ramblings, intentional obfuscations and ill disguised misdirections, with a touch of abuse of inductive logic for good measure. And to top it all off. . . the introduction of a brand new product. . . the Intelligent BOX. . .Let's go get it folks, this one just got to be even better than the CLC! Or is it Lindberger which I am smelling? Or is it just a pedestrian overgrown rodent?
Laser light leaking out of CD players. . . . . . Billions and billions of photons bouncing off the walls and plunging miraculously into the Intelligent IC where they get [{perhaps sexually} entangled with coherent photons that got emitted by a couple hundred quantum emitting somethings that then shift toward the blue light and so they go back inside the CD player box because now everything affects everything else because particle entanglement says so than like it goes inside the policarbonate of the CD and like it becomes like real transparent like but it is more like an atomic bomb of light because it's really a photon chain reaction but the new Intelligent box is even more better because it is sealed but not quite and it has its own real laser not like that old IC before because that one had a pretend laser only because it had no power but may be only some tiny batteries but we are not quite sure of that but now it does not matter but the Intelligent box is bigger and does not run out of steam and it's real good and. . . it superimposes quantum states like the poor cat in Schrodinger's old box that was not dead nor it was alive but it was kind of something like both {and probably real pissed off because old Schrodinger was just farting around with equations and couldn't give a rat's ass about the feelings of his quantumly entangled felines} . . .
Oh just give me a bleeding break! This is the biggest pile of truly entertaining hogwash I have read in quite a spell!
PS: ramblings in curly braces {} are purely my own and are not intended to be paraphrases of concepts or thoughts expressed in Mr. Kait's excellent paper. |
The pleasure was all mine Geoffkait. Even the great Schmaltzenstein could not have written a more entertaining piece. He may want to invite you to republish it in the next edition of Satura Et Fictitia.
Pehari, it really depends what you want to purchase, the original CLC, Intelligent Chip, Intelligent Box, and Brilliant Pebbles are sold by Machina Dynamica. The WMC server-based audio enhancing service is offered by me at an introductory price of $99 per month, or $999 for a full 1 year subscription. Elizabeth will tell you everything about herPrayForSound faith-based offering. Finally, audiophile-grade cryo-treated Lindberger is offered by Albert Porter's new company AudioUsmatics(from the latin verb usmo, --as, usmavi, usmatum, usmare [to smell]) in quantum-enhancing 1/4 ounce packets for $499 each. Hope this helps. |
No danger of that Joey, Audio Usmatics has patented a quantum cryo treatment for audiophile-grade ripen cheese and salted anchovy products that freezes the material only in the 4th and 5th dymention using hard shunted Neodymium ultramagnets anodized in the far ultraviolet through Cherenkov radiation capacitors. Scientific research at Bonair College proves definitely that moldering cheese and little putrescing fishes thus treated increase both in density and pungency by a factor of 3.141527. |
Zaikesman, it looks like H. C. Andersen's Chorea is alive and well at PFO. I noticed with delight that the CLC article claims the effect of the CLC is not on the equipment, but on the listener, now that is truly delish! The olde Emperor in Andersen's moral fable would be proud! |
Theaudiotweak, no musical instrument I know of has ever been influenced by something I can stick in my pocket. Acoustic grounding of a string instrument through tail pieces, end pins, chin rests of differing designs and materials is another kettle of fish all together. Even modifying instrument resonance by the application internal/external of any material, or altering the composition / shape / etc. . . of any component will alter the sound. . . but putting a 'lucky charm' in your pocket will not be noticeably helpful, even with cryo-treated batteries, that would be dead by definition. |
Theaudiotweak, I believe you about the wood of the cello having a temporary mechanical memory. Yet I do not believe we need to invoke the 4th dymention and the pangalactic sisterhood of Mother Gaya and all living planets quite yet. The poor cello is subjected to considerable mechanical stresses when played, prodded, protected, subjected to pressure, balanced over a nasty end-pin, compressed longitudinally from pegs to tailpiece. . . auch that nasty Yargar C string Forte, all connected to the latest ultra-dense Granadilla tail-piece. Oh but wait, while its toes are being pushed into its nose, that cruel soundpost is trying to burst its belly, simultaneously fighting with the bridge that is trying to bash the very same belly in. And the littlest change in stresses is going to modify the cello's balance of internal tensions. . . quite a feat it can survive being played at all! But the cello is not a 'perfectly elastic' object, being made from wood, a little metal and just a bit of boiled cow bones. . . so the poor thing does remember for a few minutes each time it is brutalized. Can you blame it? Would you behave differently if it were yourself being balanced on a razor-sharp Titanium end-pin, while all trussed up in an unnatural and unspeakable fashion? I would scream for unionization! A little mechanical memory is the least we can expect from the old tramp! |
Theaudiotweak
, the beauty of endpins--Titanium Carbon Fiber, steel, metal ceramics, cardboard, or prestressed anchovies--is that their effect is largely measurable. One may like the effect they have on the sound of an instrument, one may not. Their behavior can be modelled, or at least approximated, through some complex function derived from acoustic and mechanics. Not so the CLC, or my WMC, which to be explained and appreciated--require a substantial suspension of disbelief. Yet, as I am a reasonable man, I do invite Mr. Kait to supply me an evaluation unit of his marvellous CLC for me to test for 45 days--of course at no charge. I would post all my findings here--positive, negative, or inconclusive--as they may be. At the end of the test period I will purchase the unit if I deem its sonic effect to warrant its price, and would otherwise return it to Mr. Kait. |
Entirely your choice Geoffkait, I have no problem putting out good money for reasonably priced products based on mainstream science and technology, and whose principles of operation conform to it. I am even willing to stretch my credulity a little where pragmatic implementation seems to be preceeding sound theoretical frameworks, such as in many PCs, ICs and the like. Unfortunately, the CLC and various other related devices are stretching my admittedly secular humanistic mental strictures far beyond the bursting point. They claim to operate under principles that--while utilizing some of the raw words of science--bind these freely out of context in clauses, sentences, paragraphs and rambling explanations which have all the obscure semantic trappings of the magic of old, and defy commonly accepted norms of inductive and deductive logic. Not denying the effects of CLC on its proponents and fans, I strongly suggest such undeniable effect has merely psychological causes. . . illusion, self delusion and mass hysteria on which the tenuous world of the miraculous is based.
If you wished to prove me wrong. . . you know what to do. |
Geoffkait, do not deceive yourself, you are creating no flames. . . it's just smoke. And I am not inhaling it. |
Wellfed, I have no difficulty believing you are perceiving a great system improvement since you deployed the CLC. |
Not at all Wellfed, merely that the CLC does not operate on the equipment in the domain of physics but on the user in the psychosomatic domain. |
Sorry Wellfed, I realize that's not what you wanted to hear. . . The good news is that I still may be proven wrong. . . . and that my skepticism may turn out to be unjustified. Enjoy the CLC! |
That's reasonable Norm. . here it is:
"Not at all Wellfed, merely that the CLC does not operate on the equipment in the domain of physics as I understand it, but on the user in the psychosomatic
domain."
Yet, as I said in other places, my personal opinion is hardly relevant. Thus, I do invite Geoff Kait to submit his scholarly paper on CLC theory of operations to Nature, Science, New Scientist, and even Science News for peer review and eventual publication. When the paper is accepted for publication in any of these journals, I shall bow my head to such obviously misunderstood greatness. . . until such time, I will hold to what still appears to me to be the canonical mainstream, which is by the way quite weird enough all by itself. |
Sorry Wellfed, now I am confused by "I may do just that." . Are you the author of the CLC paper? Are you and GeoffKait one and the same? |
Zaikesman, you are right, my mistake. I was hoping Mr. Kait would see it fit to submit the very article explaining the IC rather than CLC. Yet the whole family of devices seem to be aledged to operate on broadly similar fantastic premises. |
"This stuff affects the listener - not one's system. So it does not so much change how things perform/sound, but how one responds to it (what they say)."
Interesting. . . I did not realize the CLC was a MAD (Mood Altering Device). Probably lots safer than Ecstasy. . . and cheaper in the long run. And not at all invasive, unlike James Shatner's Techno. Truly fabulous Science Fiction. . . and it's available now. . .what a deal! |
That should have been William Shatner. . . and the device/ book series is 'Tek'.Apologies to all fans of this fine SF cycle. |
Huh? Oh no, I know exactly how the CLC works. . . same as my lucky-pet-Pecan, which I used to carry in my pocket for several years. Not to talk about the two wonderful Fung Sui wooden forks I put against the picture window above my front door. These are all heavily modded audiophile-grade Pecans and wooden forks. They optimized my annual pay-increase and equally maximized my daughter school grades. |
Yes. . . well. . . I won't have 'those' particular nuts cryo-treated nor modded anytime soon, I can assure you!
Yet, I am now inspired to a feat of imaginative greatness. . . I'll deploy my 'Lucky Pecan' on top of my CDP tonight and will report on its audio results tomorrow. Nighty-night all!! |
GeoffKait, that passage by Aldiss is very inspiring. And perhaps suggestive of CLC's principle of operation? An anchor into concrete reality of the so elusive 'here and now'? Perhaps my lucky Pecan works the same way. |
Of course Geoffkait, and so is my Pecan, my now retired Fung Sui woodden forks, and let's not forget my pet anchovy--preserved for 46 years between two glass microscope slides--which reminds me of the ever-growing gap of time between this ever vanishing now and the long-vanished 'then' so long ago when the 6-year-old me plucked the little fish from under the left-most fish-monger stand in the main fish market of Santa margherita Ligure. Time is very mysterious indeed, and forms the basis of any personal mythology. Is perhaps the CLC a personal musical mythology generator of sorts? |
Yes, regretably my Pecan and my Anchovy recently interacted, creating a perilous time-warp which swallowed scores of posts. |
Oh my God. . . 'tis too late. . . the cat--I meant the anchovy--is out of the bag. . . I meant of the slide. Darn it Zaikesman, I really don't have time to herd back my pet food stuff. . . got to run and alert all physicists and engineers and stuff. . . they MUST rework everything in the book PDQ, all them equations and things, now that we have discovered time is mere illusion for sure! May be I really need a more potent amulet. . . d'ya think the CLC will make me happier? |
Sorry, that product is called the CLG (Clever Little Girlfriend) [Patent Pending]. . . and it will be marketed by me! it will consist of a little very highly modified pendent bejeweled clock that you will let your girlfriend wear, and. . . you know the rest. . . |
Instruction set at a molecular level, eh? yes, very entertaining indeed. Unfortunately it's complete unspecific childish rubbish. |
Geofkait, yes you could call it 'mature' rubbish in a way. Or perhaps even more precisely 'ripe' rubbish. it all depends if the term rubbish is more pertaining to the mind of the author or of the intellectual scent emanating from the end product: childish in the former sense, yet quite well ripened in the latter. |
