Can we contribute

Flacid. “The amplifier’s sound was flacid. Even at high volumes, the sound barely ruffled the sheets.”

@audition__audio  , "hammered dog $hit?"

As in, ". . . sounds like hammered dog $hit."

@audition__audio   Amen, sir. Having to guess as to what the reviewer may or may be trying to say is tiresome at best. A healthy dose of honest reviews sure would be nice...

@immatthewj , lol.

Some of these are great. If only the mags would adopt a few of these.

"...burnt to a crisp..."

FUBAR (either one)

"...boat anchor..."

"...melodious..."

"...micro-detailed..." (or "-detailing")

It’s when you notice the adjectives are getting a bit heavy-handed or stretching the limits of definitive copy....

(The first 3 would be very rare, but likely more appreciated...;)...)