... I’ve seen some (shall we say) sophomoric ’balanced’ products offered in high end audio that had almost no CMRR at all ...
That's not surprising - there's quite a bit of mediocre audio equipment on the market. But to argue that balanced components that do not observe the AES spec are somehow "improper" is misguided. They can still offer potential advantages over single-ended components, including improved CMRR.
... you’ll hear cable differences, the system will be subject to ground loop possibility and you won’t be able to drive long cables ...
I'm not having those problems with my mostly ARC system, which is not AES compliant.
As an aside, I'd wager there are balanced, AES compliant components on the market that are easily bettered by some single-ended gear. As is often the case, the implementation is as critical as the topology or technology.