Hi-end audio is a big zero

HiFi audio is a hobby with difficult expensive choices to make. Also expensive mistakes and buyers remorse. HiFi is all about listening and experiencing a music piece with its all details. You will hear same piece from different system with different details pleasing your ears. The difference is all about listening music with all those details as musician intended and recording revealed. When you listen same song on an ordinary speaker feels like looking at Mona Lisa behind a dirty glass. More expensive the system not necessarily is a better experience.  As prices goes up definitely returns are very diminishing. So everyone settles with a system that please them, some with deep pocket goes through a journey of constant changes and updating of these systems. 
Buying process can be very very frustrating due to complexity of putting an entire system in one store. Sales people, a lot of time reluctant and lazy to create ideal listening conditions during buying process. It is nearly impossible to experience to try and audition different systems at one HiFi store. That is why attending few HiFi conventions like Axpona can be excellent opportunity to audition all these gears at one place by focusing mainly on gear within budget. It really feels like a candy shop for HiFi enthusiast. Also you meet many very knowledgeable people from industry to improve understanding of different gear. I built my system after a such experience. I had many other preferences before, and ended up with completely different systems which I never imagined. Today I am very happy with choices I made, I think I created amazingly good sounding system with in my budget. Today when I go to these conventions, I don’t feel like missing much from other more expensive systems. So my glass is clear enough to experience the art in details.

A new hifi store recently started up in my nearest city.  I ventured to have a look, they had advertised special opening deals. I noticed an amplifier I didn't know much about, the assistant asked if I was interested, I said yes, "how many watts is it? "how many do you think you need, 5 watts will drive any speaker". He then wandered away and looked on the net, "x watts he replied".  I asked "is that into 4 or 8 ohms" again I got the question back, "does it matter?". Well clearly it does to me, the customer. It became clear the assistant knew rather less about the product than they should, and after 10 more minutes it was obvious they knew very little at all. Now this amplifier is approaching $10,000. Unfortunately today this behaviour is common. Having been involved in this hobby for over 40 years it is clear that many dealers today seem to think all their clients are millionaires and idiots. Most people spending $10,000 on amplifiers are likely both reasonably well-off and knowledgable about hifi, yet many stores don't seem to have the faintest idea of how to communicate with them.

@cdc 

where are you located? I know some dealers in DFW who do this.

Equipment doesn’t matter? Bringing a piece of equipment home to demo in your system doesn’t matter? Just listen to whatever you have?

This is crazy talk! What plays music is the equipment you are playing it on. 
You can go over to your friends house, go to 50 dealers, or 10 audio shows, the ONLY way you are going to know if that piece of equipment will sound good in your system and in your room is to actually use it in your room and in your system. Your room and system synergy are 2 of the highest areas you need to concentrate on.

I also like AirPods, HomePods and other cheaper speakers, but if I want the best I can afford, they will be demoed in my room and in my system land if I can’t, I would just put them up for sale

I agree that the room is very important... even if not officially "acoustically treated" and just couch and rug.  And, the important thing is to match the speakers w the room, which is a situation I'm struggling w right now; the speakers I "really" want do not go well in the room setup that I have, so I have to wait and get smaller speakers that work.  These facts do lead to the importance of being able to hear the gear in your room, with return privileges.  

Luckily, there are numerous online retailers that are fine w accepting returns 30 or 60 days in... that should be enough to assess.  I mean, don't abuse the privilege, but it's a nice "insurance policy" against an instantly regrettable decision.

It's not just Hi Fi... with the demise of BM stores, it's hard to know if what you're looking at is going to "work" or not.  I'm going crazy about this right now w bathroom vanities; I have a project that needs to be done once and right, but I cannot find any BM anywhere near me that actually carry the products, and it's hard to ultimately judge until they arrive and can see them in their intended place (even if not fully installed).  I've already sent one back; couldn't even find the proper measurements of the product... it was gorgeous and high quality, but didn't work in the space, functionally... so it was returned. What a hassle!   

Likewise w Hi Fi... it's gotta work IN YOUR SPACE.