Did I Expect too much?

Manufacturers look for the cheapest parts that get them the sound they are looking to achieve.  That is a reasonable approach.  Any other part that alters the sound could be improving the sound or making it worse from the prospective of the buyer--it depends on personal taste and system matching.  Even if one part seems to be better to the manufacturer, the  manufacturer has to consider whether it is worth putting in a more expensive part that MAY improve the sound, but not necessarily so.  I know a custom speaker builder who often builds with ultra expensive parts and wire who has, after listening to the build, substituted in much cheaper wire that was better for the particular voicing he and the customer wanted. 

This custom builder also makes custom tube amps.  Some of his most expensive builds employ very ugly and very cheap looking binding posts made of thin brass and having plastic nuts for screwing down the lugs.  They are not really cheap because these are vintage parts, but in their day, they were cheap.  He has customers insist on the posts being replaced by the like of WBT solid silver posts because they are, and they look, expensive.  The dealer prefers the sound of the brass binding posts in his amps.

I don't think there are parts that are universally better or best, it is a matter of particular implementation and personal taste. 

Please tell us a bit about the sound of the Charney speakers you have.  I have only heard their Companion model (with Voxativ and AER drivers) and liked the sound very much. 

The Charney speakers have maybe 150 hours on them.  The AER BD3 drivers are not broken in as yet.  So best to hold off on any reviews until about 500 hours.  My initial impression of the AER drivers are that they are well balanced single source drivers with whizzer cones that enhance high frequency response. Even now, the  immediacy of transitional tones is impressive.  Full review to follow.

My experience with a few friends that were store owners or tech guys, was that many/most products seem to have some very surprisingly inexpensive parts inside...

Some manufacturers and individuals believe parts is parts, go to diy audio forums and you'll find vast majority believe measurements tell the whole story. Techies, designers, EE mostly concerned about circuits meeting certain design criteria, most of that has nothing to do with sound quality. Perhaps there is a listening panel or individual, why would you expect them to have golden ears.  As a modifier/parts changer I've been inside much equipment, use of generic parts is standard operating procedure. This is reason I no longer purchase most audio components from large corporations, I've found the smaller boutique manufacturers far more engaged with their products sound quality and using boutique parts is part of their voicing process.

I get the parts cost argument, and this may be true for some manufacturers. So,  lets say you're going to use a crap load of cheap Chinese resistors because you can get them for .20 cents apiece, this vs. Takman or other reputable resistor, perhaps these closer to $1 apiece, so I'll be generous and say there's fifty of these, so you're telling me that extra cost is not viable! Just for one example, Prima Luna uses the Takman throughout their amps and pre's, these products relatively lower priced in world of high end. The use of cheap parts in crossovers with their relatively low parts count is even more inexplicable.

SNS:  You hit it right on the head.  It’s the reason I had Min Yang at Tube Audio Labs make my 300b.  We collaborated on the best transformers, capacitors etc and  it was nor more expensive since there were no middlemen or retailers to mark up the costs