The main reason tone controls were considered bad, IMHO was they were often poorly implemented compared to the rest of the unit. Some had excellent tone and loudness circuits while others simply did not. The otherwise excellent Parasound P7 was a great example of a great preamp with really veiling tone controls.
The Denon and I believe Yamaha units which would allow you to dial in the appropriate levels of loudness were, also IMHO the best ideas for this I've ever seen. Also important to note that the F-M curves are averages. Your ears may or may not follow these curves that well, so feel free to season away as you enjoy most.