I had the Dude for a good while and just loved it, despite the lack of a remote control or a phono stage. It just makes beautiful music. In fact, it may be my favorite of the preamps I have owned over the years. Unfortunately, the designer, Paul Weitzel, passed away some time back, so you would have to find a used model. They are not exactly eye candy, but they are built like tanks. I used it with a couple of different solid state amps with outstanding results. I hope to get another one at some point, should the opportunity present itself.
Like Charles, I have never heard the Cary, though I've heard good things about it.
Best of luck in your search!