Getting into the music

@stuartk 

 I’m not sure what you mean by “a function of gear.”    
 I think I replaced my passion for music with a passion for sound.  Something I never thought possible.   
I’ve been a music lover since I was a child.
As a musician, I performed in many concert halls and soloed with orchestras. 
 I suppose that after I stopped performing I placed my creativity in the building of an exemplary stereo system. 
 I succeeded so successfully that it became a primary force in my life.  
 Of course I still love music and can be transported by it, but this audiophilia is powerful.

Thank you all for your very compassionate responses.
The problem is I’ve gotten to the point where I enjoy listening to my system so much it’s hard to turn back. I have these “manic” episodes when I relish the sound alone. Like right now I’m appreciating my newish analog setup for the first time and I’m going through a myriad of records comparing their SQ to before I had the new setup. This is pleasurable it itself.  And I do get into the music somewhat.
Conversely there are times I realize I’m not really enjoying the music for itself and the listening for sound becomes a negative and shallow pursuit.
I’m not sure if I’m too far gone.

Anyway thanks so much for your help!

EXACTLY!

Newbee,

Thank you

Interesting comment.

Excellent suggestions!

Yes. That particular quote is very incisive.  
 

Deep_333

you have a good point.

@audphile1 

I appreciate your comments.  
 Fortunately, I’ve mostly recovered from my long bout with audiophilia.  I am able to get into the music now, and still love my system. 
 The route getting there was a little different than I originally anticipated.
 My first thought was to ignore the sound altogether.  Just listen to and enjoy the music. That worked up until a point.  But, here I had this magnificent machine at my disposal.  How could  I ignore it.  
So, somehow I was actually able to get into the music THROUGH THE SOUND.. I know this sounds implausible based on all our discussions, but it actually happened. The physical sound is an aesthetic in itself.  Why not enjoy it!  
 The result is that I’ve gone back to listening with new ears, not sacrificing the music for the sound and visa versa.

 As far as the Benchmark equipment, it synergises with my  tubey vintage Conrad-Johnson preamp (recapped by CJ) ideally so that I have the best of both worlds: incredible accuracy and sweet sound.

I tend to agree with you that physical media probably sounds better than streaming (and I have tons of it) but, trying not to be compulsive about the sound, I don’t care. It sounds so good I don’t miss that 1% difference. And, of course, it’s more convenient AND you have the whole word of recorded music at your disposal.