Funniest sales pitch


What is the funniest sales pitch you've read? My current favorite is one I just read today. It was,"I'm selling these speakers because they are too good for me."
makersmark
i forgot about ( the old movin to europe ) routine , ill bet if you watch the europe movers they will be like the rolling stones, they always stick around.

mike.
Quitting the hobby! (HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA)

Wife chopped dick off when she saw the bill for these speakers - need money to have doctors sew it back on! Holding it on ice till these are sold. (Now c'mon, you really expect us to believe that "JWBobbit"?!).

Marco
how about "I got 8 of these rowland amps for Xmas, only need one"

Got i want his relatives.

I'd like to see something honest.

"Got caught in the hype, bought this stupid piece of shit, and now i realize what a goddamn idiot i am, please please please somone unload this worthless boat anchor from me. Paypal add 3%"