Why do some think "music" (not gear, trading, etc.) is the ultimate end?

Oddly, I find the same thing true of cars- I drove them. Yes, I understand the Pebble Beach mentality, but to me it’s sad to see a piece of machinery meant for the joy of driving sitting idle, perhaps rolled off a transport to be set up at a show or museum, and then returned to it’s garage slot once its appearance at a show is over. (There was a guy in Jersey with an F-40 in a room purpose built for viewing the car-- when he went bankrupt, a wall had to be removed to get access to the car).
A friend I had on the East Coast when I lived in NY visited me the first time by driving his GT 40 over to my place. Not the Ford re-boot from the early 2000’s but a real GT 40 that ran at LeMans back in the day. The type of car that most would put in museum. Not that guy- he drove it.
Sure, you can collect audio gear. I’ve known several people who do-- I have gear I don’t use that sits around in a few rooms, but I hardly consider myself a collector of vintage gear. I try and use the equipment for its intended purpose. My Quad ESLs, which I bought in 1973-4 (sorry, I’m a little imprecise about the year) were restored a few years ago and are now running in a vintage system I set up. It’s a great little system and I enjoy having and listening to that speaker. As a piece of industrial art, it’s a bit odd, but I will have owned this pair for almost 50 years. Admittedly, they sat dormant for many years when I used other speakers, awaiting refurbishment.

Do what you like. I think the thread that the OP was referring to didn’t say gear collecting was a bad thing, or that enjoying music was "superior" to gear collecting, though it is really the ultimate purpose for which this stuff was designed. I can appreciate good electro/mechanical design for its own sake. I just happen to use my hi-fi as a means to an end. The fact that there is some intrinsic beauty to the design, manufacturing quality or other aspects of the equipment is simply a nice by-product. Some of the gear I prize would not win any awards for aesthetics. But does that make it inferior? I don’t think so.
Maybe I missed the point of your post as a rejoinder to the other thread, @hilde45, but who said you can’t love gear for its own sake?

@hilde45- I'm not taking you to task. In fact, maybe you started this thread in response to one I missed-- I was thinking of the thread that said you aren't really an audiophile unless you are churning through equipment somewhat frequently. I don't care about being called an audiophile (in fact, it has a negative connotation to me), but I think there are a lot of different types of people drawn to this hobby, from engineering types to let's get a buzz on and listen to some tunes.
I've enjoyed the equipment I've owned over the years, but my personal priority at this stage of my life is discovering new to me music. I do take pride in the systems I've put together and enjoy the gear head aspect, but I'm not driven to acquire better and better gear at this point in my life. But, that's what makes all of this so interesting, no? Each of us is different, with different priorities.

You raised the rhetorical question in this thread why the enjoyment of music is elevated over buying/swapping out gear? You then suggested that the usual answer-- that the equipment is simply a vehicle to access and enjoy the music was, if not a token response, one that didn't fully reflect all the reasons people engage in this hobby.  
 I agree with that, but I also think it becomes very personal-- starting with  what you were exposed to musically (and gear wise) at what point in time, to whether you can play an instrument to whether you can solder or build equipment. All of those are factors and each of us differ in our backgrounds, knowledge and understanding as much as we do our musical taste or preference.

My "quest" has been to get outside of my comfort zone, musically, to avoid the audiophile traps and to better understand the musical experience. Many people of that ilk spend a fair amount of time listening to live music. Or get into the mystical aspects, which starts to make my brain overheat.
 There's been a lot written about music and the brain, emotional responses and the science of music. All of it is fascinating to me, as are archival recordings, and the techniques used to retrieve and preserve those. I guess the most we can expect from each other is to learn something, no? And perhaps to have a good laugh, a glass of wine (or whatever) and enjoy it while we can. 
I also think it is good to question one's own assumptions occasionally. I go through mid-life crises every 5 years or so and wind up reassessing things. Perhaps I'm just in a mood. Sorry for the lengthy response. 
Bill hart

@hilde45-- You are asking a question that I’m not capable of answering-- it seems to deal with psychology to a large degree. Why are some people deeply engaged by a pursuit and others only have a passing interest? I’m excluding the "I’m not interested at all" but instead focusing on why one person may shop for a stereo, learn enough or rely on advice of friends or a salesperson and be done with the pursuit, happy to utilize the equipment ---as in your example of a toaster-- (I have yet to find a good one these days), where others get bitten by the bug and really do a deep dive into the particular field where it becomes a hobby or passion.
I think in many past threads we’ve already excluded attention getting as a factor-- having a cool car as a poseur is certainly an easier way to attract attention than "wanna hear my stereo?" So, in some ways, the analogy to cars, and perhaps to other hobbyist pursuits fails. (Most car guys I knew were hardcore enthusiasts, not
poseurs, and a lot were capable of turning a wrench).
I suspect it has something to do with a passion that gets fulfilled. There was a guy who collected model trains- his entire basement in Pasadena was walls of enclosed glass shelves with various trains, along with a large model railroad set up. I doubt he did this to attract a mate, or draw attention to himself. There was some need that this fulfilled. Perhaps somebody qualified to speak to this aspect of the human experience can offer insight. I tend to go overboard on most things I do-- it’s sort of my nature if something draws my attention enough.
Of course, there are many things about which I’m completely ignorant. I enjoyed watching Queen’s Gambit knowing I can’t remember even the basics of chess.
My interest in music goes back to my earliest years. I can read, and play but these days rarely do so; I was involved in the industry but at a remove (as outside counsel) and do like gear. So, I can answer the question for myself. But, for others? I think we wind up back at the personal history/background/exposure thing-- and truth be told, both my profession and my interest in this hobby happened to coincide because of my fascination with music. I heard music in my head that I wanted to play but I never considered myself gifted in the way some musicians are--and if you asked them, I’m not sure they could give you a clear answer as to their prowess. Their ability to express themselves came through the music itself (though some are quite articulate).
Not sure most of this is on point, but it’s kind of hard to sum up humanity, passion and creativity in an Internet post. It’s an elusive thing--and one that is endless in the sense that a creative person is always looking forward until they reach an age where they are unable to call upon their gifts anymore. (I had the pleasure of hearing Glenn Campbell on that Goodbye Tour or whatever it was called and it was apparent that he wasn’t all there mentally, but he still had the muscle memory-- his playing was inspired). Sorry to leave this on a bittersweet note- but we all only have so much time-- and that may be a driver of passion too-- the knowledge that all of us are mortal and can only have so much time and energy to pursue whatever it is that makes life worthwhile.

@hilde45- I think thread has transcended the usual banter here, and asked some hard questions about the "why" of it-- our universe, small as it may be within the world at large, offers a huge number of paths to pursue.
To me, the issue is exposure. To music, to systems, and the process of learning. I was struck by a book I happened on while killing time in Boston one day, called "The Perfect Wrong Note." It’s really a meditation on why musicians are taught by rote and calls into question how music is learned by students, suggesting that a player who has a tendency to play a wrong note can learn from that experience. It’s a little "zen" but a worthwhile read.
I started in this hobby’s first (or second, depending on how you count it) golden age- in the late ’60s when solid state was replacing tubes and records were still a mainstream medium. Even at that time, there was a tier of equipment that was priced beyond what most could afford, but promised a level of performance that was revelatory. Much was promoted in the U.S. by Harry Pearson of The Absolute Sound fame, and in a slightly more grounded way by J. Gordon Holt, of the original Stereophile. (There were many magazines available at the time, some quite good, that offered more technical articles as well as consumer fodder for the casual or aspirational reader). The goal, as it was stated at the time, was to assemble something that resembled real music and short of that, something that accurately reproduced the recording.
The first goal is almost impossible in my experience. It works best with small scale stuff, not full orchestras and with fairly simple, uncluttered musical passages. In my experience, a lot of systems suffer some form of congestion when things get busy or complex and the illusion of "real" falls down.
The alternative, being true to the recording, is equally elusive. Few of us have had the opportunity to sit in on an actual recording session and compare it to the resulting recording, particularly after it has been mixed down and made available as released product. (Listening to playback in the booth over studio monitors from the rolling tape-- and here I date myself-- isn’t the same as listening to the record). And a lot of records sound good not because they are made simply- to the contrary, there is a fair amount of studio gimmickry that goes into making something that sounds "natural."
Jules Coleman, who was a professor of jurisprudence (the philosophy of the law) wrote some interesting things before he retired, one of which questioned the primacy of "accurate" reproduction as a false ideal. I refer to him here only because I think he tries to unravel an assumption most of us have about the role of accuracy in hi-fidelity reproduction: [url]https://thevinylpress.com/listening-to-recorded-music-a-rumination/[/url]
Coming back to the choice of paths, there are many-- with the current plague, we aren’t free to visit showrooms, people’s homes or take in live shows, but that will pass. Listening to as many different systems as possible is not only revealing of strengths but of weaknesses of various systems and that’s instructive too.
We used to have audio clubs, which do still exist in a few cities in the States and perhaps abroad, but much of the kibitzing is now done on chat boards like this, rather than in person. (We didn’t necessarily accomplish much at this meetings, apart from whatever the featured demonstration was-- it was largely a social thing, a chance to swap records, and casually chat and see folks that shared a common interest). The Internet has many advantages, one being worldwide reach and the ability to find things that are not readily within your immediate circle, geographically or socially, but it does have a certain flatness to it, compared to meeting in person.
I know of no one who is expert in all the things associated with our hobby- there are so many niches just to Western music alone that one could devote one’s life just to the study of one performer or composer (not an entirely uncommon thing).
I guess, at bottom, my point is that if you are just really starting out in this hobby, the best thing you can do for yourself once this Covid thing passes is to get out there and experience as much as you can-- by way of prerecorded music, live performances, attendance at seminars, trade shows (a good place for the audio minded to socialize and meet some of the manufacturers). I was never particularly skilled at mechanical and engineering things, so that’s another deep dive. I can read technical papers with some modest understanding and ask questions of people with more knowledge than I have. 
You could look at it as acquisitiveness, but the acquisition of knowledge, rather than "things." (Though I have lived life as an ardent materialist and still have a substantial record collection). Indeed, that takes us to yet another branch, the collection of recordings, which is yet another aspect of this hobby or overlaps with it. And is itself a vast subject, with many different niches of knowledge.
I treat all of this as an adventure at this point, given my stage in life- I’m retired, my systems are relatively mature, and I have the time to explore and learn. It’s hugely rewarding and I wish the same for you.
regards,
Bill Hart

Jeeves- interesting viewpoint. Anything that involves "collecting" while an activity during the hunt, is ultimately passive, e.g. film collecting, record collecting, stamps, baseball cards. (though some of those "hobbies" are in reality, money making enterprises, or involve trading, but leave that aside).
Is buying equipment a hobby--going to a store, or website, writing out the check or filling in the cc payment? Set up is an activity, but once that’s done, unless you are constantly tweaking, it’s passive.
Not sure it really matters at the end of the day what you call this way of occupying time or interest (or spending money). I can tell you I exercised a lot of muscles the other day moving around quite a few stacks of records. :)

PS: for me, a lot involves research and reading about the recordings, the performers, the sessions, etc. And some writing. All of that is an activity, though pretty sedentary. As to being "absorbed," I think that depends on the degree of involvement and time spent. 
Bill