Bluebottle,
You are not a dummy. A dummy wouldn't ask questions. You'll get this thing working fine, just be patient. It does sound like the power supply is going south, IMHO. You described exactly what happened to my table.
Pbb, relax. It's okay. You don't have to like vinyl or understand our love for it. Come to my house and I'll be nice and show you a vinyl library that is in excellent condition with nearly all of it being very quiet. You can choose what we listen to and you can be the judge. I honestly don't think you've heard a reasonably good vinyl rig set up correctly. Please don't throw insults at us though. We do have feelings and remember, you're insulting what is very near and dear to our hearts. Every one of us would change if it was warranted.
No hard feelings here. You?
Patrick