Stylus cleaning: tools, fluids, techniques?

I'm interested in your opinions about the best stylus cleaning tools and fluids are. I'd also like some input as to how to clean the stylus; but not so basic as to "always in the direction of record play". I'm more interested in how often, always with fluid, sometimes dry, how much force against the cantilever.

This question comes about as the result of my killing an inexpensive, but enjoyable, cartridge. I'm wondering if I "loved it too much". I'd like to get my vinyl hygeine down before the upgrade bug bites that part of my system.