Sure, some of the larger-than-life celebrities of the Hi-Fi world can be eccentric, and yes, snooty. But that's a personality trait, not a trait of the gear itself. I don't begrudge those with the resources to invest big money into their stereo systems, and I rarely run into audiophiles, journalists or retailers who look down on me because I don't have such resources. And when I do, I simply don't care.
I am very active in my local audio club. Through my contacts with other regional clubs, I have noticed that the culture of each club differs dramatically. Our club is as unpretentious as can be. With a few exceptions, most of our members are dreamers, DIYers and/or music lovers. Nobody is ever looked down upon because their system didn't cross the six-figure threshhold. We hold our meetings in a variety of venues, but many meetings are held in members' homes with modest, but lovingly assembled systems. I don't think any new visitor to one of our meetings would have described our club as "snooty". On the contrary, we have a good time, joke around a lot, and generally treat each other with respect. That doesn't mean we don't offer constructive criticism of the systems we hear, but it is never along the lines of "you can't get good sound unless you spend six figures". I think we may have lost a member or two over the years because there aren't enough really high-dollar systems in the club. I suppose for someone with one of these systems, listening to much more modest systems could be somewhat uninteresting. But some of our members do have very expensive systems, and not one of them ever belittles the less expensive rigs in other members' homes.
As for the music, we make room for everything. Would a rap CD clear the room and send people heading for the food table? Sure. But I do the same when a drum or organ "spectacular" starts, or opera, for that matter. So what? Let someone who likes that stuff enjoy the sweet spot for a while. Later, I'll wait my turn and put on a Porcupine Tree or Reverend Horton Heat CD, and the organ, drum solo, and opera afficianados can grab a bite to eat and have a chat in another room. I might get some groans from some for my musical choices, but that's done in a spirit of friendship. Heck, I've turned a few of the members on to PT and other artists. Music is highly personal, and discovering new music through the club is one of the more rewarding aspects of belonging to it. I barely listened to jazz or classical when I first joined. Now, I have a growing collection of both. All thanks to a group of very welcoming, non-judgemental, non-snooty audiophiles.