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God, I hate to ask this…

Recent conversations with the oncologist have been replete with phrases like ‘stage 4’,metastasis’ and unappealing statistics applied to survival rates. While my real and financial affairs are well settled I am most perplexed with how to approach this large pile of audio stuff e.g. 3 secondary systems in addition to the primary one, several thousand lp’s, a similar number of CD’s/SACD’s, a closet full of cable etc. I am utterly confident that I am not alone in this. While I am comfortable that my wife will love and care for my dog I am less confident that the Avantgardes will elicit such emotional investment. Although my immediate inclination is to cling desperately to these treasured objects it seems patently unfeeling to expect someone else to deal with all of this. My wife will have enough to do. I could just divest myself of much of it and depend on the collection of headphones that I began to amass during the first illness. I really don’t want to do this. I would also like to pre-bequeath much of it to friends assuming that they wanted it but all of them have been adamant in their refusal to discuss this with me and probably will remain so until the 11th hour. As childlike as it seems, I am emotionally invested in these fruits of a lifelong passion and want them to end up where they will be respected and loved . This seems to be a juncture that we will all come to. I would be grateful to hear the contemplations that all you have had in this, admittedly, sobering matter. 
To all of you, good cheer and good health.

 

williamjohnston
hbarrel's avatar
hbarrel
530 posts
 

As so many others on this forum I am not a spring chicken and also face the consequences of age. 
My thoughts and prayers to your future. 
That said… if your affairs are in order and the wife is not in need of the full value of your toys consider simply giving away stuff. Not necessarily with zero renumeration but priced to be gone.
Maybe give some of it away to a sorority or fraternity house. Let it get used. 
Hold an auction with the proceeds to go to the folks of your choice. 
I walk around my house looking at the tools, nuts, bolts, and bull crap I have accumulated and start chuckling.
I am currently in the process of dispersing my collection of superfluous bull feces. Easier said than done.

ibmjunkman's avatar
ibmjunkman
264 posts
 

I have thinking about this stuff, too. My hobby is going to a computer museum. My guns are going to a younger new friend. My late 70s/80s era audio system is going to an audio store that repairs and sells said stuff.

After everything else is sold the cash will be spread across a few animal aid organizations.

clustrocasual
119 posts
 

It's very charitable if they were to get sold or donated to audio folks of any level, who will enjoy all of it for what it was intended for. My hope is that my lifetime of specialized knick knacks "will reach the right people". Thats good enough for me! 

lalitk's avatar
lalitk
5,821 posts
 

@williamjohnston 

I am sorry to learn about your situation. You’ve articulated something that many people in our community quietly think about but rarely give voice to: what happens to the things we’ve poured decades of passion, care, and money into—especially when those things hold meaning for us but may feel like a burden to our loved ones.

I will speak to the steps I’ve taken in case my spouse end up disposing my system. Took me a while but knowing my wife has no interest in my main system, I’ve put together a spreadsheet outlining all of my gear, purchase price and media collection (CLZ Music software) that would help her dispose off my treasured possessions into the hands of people or places that will fetch a decent value. 

A spreadsheet or thinning some of your gear now is all about how to leave traces of possessions you’ve enjoyed and treasured. Your dog will be loved by your wife; your music legacy can be loved by friends, younger enthusiasts, or even institutions. What matters is that you’ve thought about it—and that is already a great kindness to those you love.

Take care and enjoy music! 

limomangus's avatar
limomangus
1,713 posts
 

I know what you guys,are taking about.I have to one of these days start down sizing,alot.I sold all my albums in 2015...1,100.....I k ow have bought 1,500...omg...and for get about cheap cds Thousands....I only have my daughter. 

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