Thank you for your sobering and thoughtful post, William. My heart goes out to you.
I have legitimately prayed for your peace, and thoughtful examination into your eternal soul's final destination. We will all face death and it's long shadow forces us to make honest evaluations of everything in our remaining life and afterlife.
You mentioned that the people you consider most inclined to inherit your gear won't talk of it. I understand their reluctance. May I proffer that you will it to them in a way that they will most appreciate what you have given them- perhaps with exhaustive explanations of that makes it special and how to maximize it's enjoyment.
I'd also suggest asking your local dealer or a dealer who will speak honestly with you to quote a purchase price with agreement to deconstruct and move the equipment out of it's location with zero hassle to your wife at a time best for her. Of course TMR is an option, but they pay 30% of retail at best. I'm pretty sure a competent dealer could do better.
May God bless and keep you William.