There is definitely a difference between listening to your system and listening to music. Your can switch on the “analytical” mode… or try not to turn it on.
However, your system plays a big part of what you tend to do. For decades I worked on improving all the obvious stuff, details, slam, imaging, sound stage. I proudly listened to my “Reference System” as I came to call it. I could instantly identify the venue, mastering of the recording.
I would be glued to my system, for 45 minutes many evenings. The most I could get as I was working. But if I did have more time… well 45 minutes was enough. I would loose interest.
Making a very long story short. I realized the details were way out of proportion to the music and the rhythm and pace was being destroyed. Ten years later… all tube Audio Research gear and Sonus Faber speakers (I ditched the planar speakers) and I am pulled into my system. All the details, soundstage, bass is there. But they are in proportion to the major musical components and the rhythm and pace is spectacular. I fall into the music… I don’t notice the system. I listen now three hours a day and find it really difficult to pull myself away from it at the end.
I can tell in any system what is distracting from the music now. This skill took me a very long time (decades… ok, I’m slow). But as an example I took a friend down to an audio store. We auditioned three integrated amps. The Luxman - highly detailed, The Pass - natural and foot tapping, Audio Research… my eyes would close and I would fall into the music. Easy to tell which I wanted. But I recommended the Pass for my friend. It was because he was new to high end audio and craved slam and flash. The Pass delivered that, but with the rhythm and pace which would satisfy when you were not being impressed with the bass and soundstage.
There is equipment made for many different purposes / tastes. Many of us love the pursuit because we enjoy using our analytical skills. But these can lead us away from what we really wanted when we started.