How are you planning on using a speaker like the Spendors? Your original post suggested that you couldn't put them on stands and seemed to imply that you had very little flexibility on placement. They're great little speakers, from all reports, but I can't imagine they're going to sound good stuck on a bookshelf.
They're hard to find and I don't know that they'd sound good for HT, but the Linn Kan Mk II's are designed to at least be put close to a wall if not actually on a bookshelf. They're very musical and very small. They usually run about $450-500 a pair used, so you could get 4 for your target price.
We're not giving you marriage advice, we're giving you audio-nut advice. It's a lot like golf-nut advice - if you want to pursue it with any real vigor, you're going to have to put up with a lot of potential friction with your significant other. Might as well brace yourself for it, but don't let it ruin your fun. -Kirk