Why are brick and mortar HiFi dealers so bad?

I have rarely found a reasonably decent HiFi dealer and I live in the New York metro area where there are probably more per capita than anywhere else.  I've been to a lot of shops and I'm tired of the smug attitudes, the lousy customer service, weird return policies, etc.  Friends state that the owners are jaded because people come in and listen to a bunch of gear and then go buy it elsewhere or pre-owned on web sites like Audiogon.  If that is the case, figure out a better sales strategy or shutter your store.  I've moved onto Music Direct and Audio Advisor and Upscale Audio.  Buy it and try it on your own system in your own listening room with a money-back guarantee.  If you know a decent HiFi retailer, please pass it along.