"Welcoming to Barbaria, my infidel friends. Ooh, what is this peeking out from under your underwear...it's a bottle of whiskey on my head. The whiskey head tax here in Barbaria is 1060 karooms or I could challenge you to a 'diet cola'"
"Just pay it, sir, we're in over our heads."
"So what is the purpose of your visit to Spires"
"My good man, this is the American ambassador. We're here to take over the American Embassy"
"Ooooh, that's lots of fun. My friends and I do it every week, but you need men with underwear on their heads and guns..."
