2. analog
  3. 1127282230

The effect of the Expanding Universe on turntables

Since the Universe has been continually expanding after the Big Bang, then it stands to reason that all objects have expanded also , but not nessecarily in proper proportion. This means that the turntable you buy today will actually be larger(and contain more mass) at some date in the distant future (20 years?). I have now discovered why I have never had a used turntable (over 100 turntables) that is on accurate 33&1/3 RPM speed, even with quality synchronous motors. This phono-nomenon can only be attributed to the fact that all the motor parts and the platter are now larger and more massive than previously and thus the ratios of pullies and gears is no longer as designed (in the past), this is the only explanation I can offer as to why the speed of old turntables is faster than when new(by a small percent).It also explains why many older mechanical devices never work properly , no matter how well maintaied and repaired.
mint604

Showing 2 responses by rnm4

rnm4
308 posts
 
Um, you are seriously caught in the grip of an unrealistic and misguided quest for perfect accuracy if you think the expansion of the universe and space time curvature could possible be relevant to to the musical performance of objects of such middle size and duration as turntables. Why not just site the second law of thermodynamics and give up right there? Why not pick at the electronics, where there are transfers of energy approaching light speed, where everything gets all weird.

Honestly, people.
rnm4
308 posts
 
Yes, I meant "cite" not "site" -- as in "citation". Ever since the advent of web "sites" I both occasionally get "cite" and "site" confused (homonyms are so stupid, but they do enable amusement) and find myself typing so quickly, and for such trivial reasons, that I make this, and many other mistakes of a similar careless kind often, and let them through.

Hand check: how many of you early posters here really did have tongue in cheek, and how many were serious? From the OP's reply to johnnantais, I imagine he indeed was kidding, in which case my hat's off. Certainly one of the more successful, drier satyrical jibes I've come accross on this sight. I however, serious, I stand by my prior.
More to discover