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Study finds your Amplifier reveal your personality

Originally posted by chris.redmond2@bushinternet.com (A) on July 18, 2002 at 14:29:58 on AA:

Just in.

Studies by the Birmingham University of Psychology - primarily dealing with the correlation between motor vehicles and their owners` personalities have also revealed what appears to be startling conclusions concerning which brand of amplifier an individual purchases; obviously someone on the team has an interest in audio.

Here are the results, although due to time constraints I`ve had to do a little editing........

MARK LEVINSON (Solid State);
You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You lie a great deal. On the other hand you tend to be careless and impractical, causing you to make the same mistakes again and again. People think you are stupid.

KRELL (Solid State);
You have a vivid imagination and often think you are being followed by special agents. You have a minor influence over your associates and people resent you flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are generally a coward. Krell owners do terrible things to small animals.

Audio Research (Valves);
You are a pioneer and hold most people in contempt. You are quick tempered, scornful and impatient of people. You are not very nice.

PLINIUS (Solid State);
You are practical and persistent. You have a dogged determination and work like a bull. Most people think you are stubborn and bull-headed. You constantly praise your amplifier whenever possible. You are a communist.

MUSICAL FIDELITY (Solid State);
You are a quick and intelligent thinker. People like you a great deal. However, you are inclined to expect too much for too little. This means you are cheap. Musical Fidelity owners are known for committing incest.

ARCAM (Solid State);
You are sympathetic and understanding of other people`s problems. They think you are a sucker. You are always putting things off. That`s why you will never make anything of yourself. Most people out of work are Arcam owners.

MARANTZ (Solid State);
You consider yourself a born leader. Others think you are pushy. Most Marantz owners are bullies. You are vain and dislike honest criticism. Your arrogance disgusts people. Most Marantz owners are thieves. You have an embarrassing bowal complaint.

MARANTZ (Valves):
You are the logical type and hate disorder. This nit-picking is sickening your friends. You are cold, unemotional, and sometimes fall asleep when making love. Marantz (Valves) owners make good bus drivers.

COPLAND (Valves);
You are the artistic type and have difficulty with reality. Chances of monetary gain are excellent. Most female Copland owners are prostitutes. All Copland owners die of venereal disease.

MOTH (Solid State);
You are shrewd in business and cannot be trusted. You will achieve the pinnacle of success because of your total lack of ethics. Most Moth owners are murdered.

MERIDIAN (Solid State);
You are optimistic and enthusiastic. You have a reckless tendency to rely on luck since you lack talent. The majority of Meridian owners are drunks or dope fiends or both. People laugh at you a great deal. You remember their names and addresses.

QUAD (Solid State);
You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You don`t do much of anything and are lazy. There has never been a Quad owner of any importance. Quad owners should avoid standing still too long before they take root and turn into trees.

Best Regards,
Chris Redmond.
atzen811

Showing 6 responses by esoxhntr

esoxhntr
196 posts
 
Albert:

I have to take a crack at this!!! As a Wolcott owner you have trouble coming to any sort of decision - you are wishy-washy. You frequently pee in the bathtub and your bedroom is filled from floor to ceiling with nerf balls. You like to put cats in the dryer and giggle maniacally when they come of of a hi-spin cycle and fall down.

I on the other hand own Blue Circle - I like to push the envelope by seeing how many quarters I can stick in my nose. if I had a tail I would chase it all a day, stopping only to chase the odd car and lick myself. I amuse myself by drilling holes in objects until they fall apart. I cheerfully eat liver.

Comments?

esoxhntr
196 posts
 
Nrchy:

If I buy your amp, can I be a communist? I've always wanted to be a communist and march and sing all the fun communist party songs. What kind of amp do you have comrade audiophile?

Mind you with all the self doubt you are expressing, you must be a....ROWLAND OWNER???
esoxhntr
196 posts
 
Albert and Trelja:

You guys are too much! Any more of these anecdotes and there will be almost enough material for a National Audiophile Enquirer. I knew there was a reason that I never liked Carver.

Just for the record there was a meeting of the "REAL" BCSS this afternoon. The phony upstart BCSS is in the process of being neutralized. It is strongly suspected that the fake BCSS are really aliens from the Motari Nebula who are having severe trouble coping with the effects of the Earth's atmosphere and the depletion of the ozone layer. This is a very new development, so please do not spread the news too widely. Neither cat, nor liver, nor cheese were served at the post meeting brunch.
esoxhntr
196 posts
 
Hey Trelja - how did you know about the t-shirt?
esoxhntr
196 posts
 
No, no, Trelja - this is very wrong. You obviously were recruited by the quasi-secret Blue Circle Society. "REAL" Blue Circle Secret Society (hereafter known as the BCSS) members are required to ritualistically dye their own anti-cat sentiment t-shirt (it MUST be a regulation Fruit Of The Loom product) at midnight on the night of a new moon. All BCSS members must create a unique design so that the BCSS t-shirt can only be identified by spectral analysis at a BCSS meeting.

Also, at a REAL BCSS meeting, cheese would never be mentioned (to mention dairy products even in passing is a severe rules infraction) unless as a descriptive reference to another audio product, most often KRELL. And cat is never, EVER served baked. Stir-fried and barbequed are the only acceptable methods of preparation, though a radical splinter faction is lobbying for a special deep-fried recipe. As a purist I am not in favour of this possible new addition.

There are no secret BCSS handshakes, BCSS members fear physical contact! It is undesirable to touch a person who has been in possible contact with certain audio equipment of a less expensive nature, and Blue Circle gear can be rendered less pure sounding by introducing molecules from any of the lesser brands such as Sony, Pioneer, JVC...I'm sure you get the picture.

Lastly, BCSS members would never have set up a meeting at a Radio Shack, unless they sent double-blind cutout drones, each of whom would be wearing a fez and named Mustafa. A Wal Mart would have been possible, but the preferred location would be a Winn-Dixie in front of the customer service area.

It is just as well that you were ejected from this group - I should warn you that no possible good can come from your association with these "pretend" BCSS members. They consistently exhibit undesirable behavioural characterisics and are suspected of introducing several moderately communicable diseases to the North American continent. I will write a full report to the BCSS executive council reporting this unauthorized activity and commending you for acting with great courage and moral fibre. Congratulations.

By the way - not that this is important - do you like liver???
esoxhntr
196 posts
 
Jealouse:

NAD stands for No Appreciable Disorders. So far you are relatively healthy - but beware!!! I started with NAD about 20 years ago, and have become a serious audio mess since then. I am afriad that you are destined for darker times, especially if you like Ementhaler cheese, liver, or apparently sheep.
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