Remotes: Who needs 'em?

OK, I'll address Bbro's cross examination. I don't watch TV-- there is too much real life to live, so no remote problem there... I don't particularly enjoy Springsteen, but I did gain a lot of respect for him when I heard him chanting "fifty-seven channels and there's nuthin' on..." years ago. However, the question is appropriate as a TV is an appliance, but audio gear is audio gear. Anyway, I only own manual transmission cars, prefer motorcycling to driving and walking to either, and yes, I park remotely to avoid those trolling for close spots. I always take the stairs within five or six floors. Don't need keyless entry-- I never lock the car because everyone else does and thieves either assume mine is also locked or can steal my change without breaking the windows. So now y'all know what a nutcase I am, but what's that got to do with fifty-six little buttons on a pre-amp remote?

Maybe a good, solid remote with a volume control-- I'll give you cats that, but what else do you need to do in the few minutes you are allowed to sit down anymore?

In my real life, I am a molecular biologist, so I have very little fear of complexity or technology. My complaint is with unnecessary complexity and the consumerist idea that more button-operated gadgets makes a better life-- this philosophy has worked its way into audio over the past few decades. Yes, this does have a lot to do with audio, or what we once knew as audio...

OK-- Now we're getting somewhere! I'll attempt to address some of the more thoughtful comments and questions that are emerging. There are three operatives here, in ascending order of relevance:

1. No Hyperbole! The preamp in question is a Rotel RC-995-- perhaps at best a mid-fi piece to most of you, but purchased to match a RT-990 and RCD-991 that do perform at hi-fi levels, and because it synergizes very well sonically with the two amps that I intend to use with it. However, I did make a mistake-- there are actually 57 buttons on the remote, not 56 as my stultified eyes first estimated. Before any of you technocrats or others who have a firm grasp of the obvious jump on me, the remote is indeed designed to control other Rotel components, including four video sources (components that ALREADY have their own remotes) from one large, 57-button, James T. Kirk-style console.

Now, I am IN TOTAL AGREEMENT with those of you who find a volume and mute very handy, as well as a track selector for a CD player (why not go ahead and manipulate the program content of a convenience medium?). The critical volume buttons are just two among the 57. The mute button is a tiny one just under the power button. So, the most important, and arguably the only important, controls on the whole stupid thing represent less than 6% of the expanse of little plastic buttons. The first six track selector buttons are dual-function to allow you to alternatively select from up to six discs in a carousel changer. To bring you this vast array of perceived personal control (and today's marketing is all about the perception of personal choice and control*), these buttons actuate switches that are of no better quality than the fifty or so that you will NEVER USE, once you memorize the location of the relevant, cheap little buttons (I do like listening in dim light with a glass of cab or zin or IPA). Miss the mute, and your power goes off. As far as the other fifty or so, you go ahead and memorize their functions and locations, taking care not to confuse them with those of your other devices...

2. Yes, indeed we are becoming a more physically lazy and nutritionally decrepit society as a whole, but this is not the intent of my comments. I am far more upset with the INTELLECTUAL laziness and decrepitude that would allow a manufacturer to actually produce such a monument to idiocy, as well as anyone who would consider fifty-seven (not including dual-function) buttons better than, say, six or seven. While I'm confident that some of you can tell yourselves "Who cares about the other fifty-four? I'll just use the volume and mute," every time we buy something like this, the marketers and designers produce the next iteration with 62 buttons and five video inputs-- all they have to do is make the volume and mute buttons smaller. After all, 0.003% of the potential buyers may in fact be bedridden or legless.

3. I have been through some tough situations and can certainly live a meaningful life knowing that there is an unused remote (actually several!) in the carton(s) in my basement. However, I am concerned that this is just a signpost on the road we are being cattle-prodded down. Once I begin buying new, well-made, bona-fide hi-end, will I even have the choice? Will a 115-button control center be considered a default afterthought whose advantages would be lost on only a smelly troll living in a bomb shelter? I would NOT have bought this piece new for the above reasons-- Don't feed the bears, as they say.

Mr. Schroeder, you hit it squarely on its pointy head-- a cell is quite complex, but no more complex than it needs to be to function efficiently in its environment.

Do any of you cats REALLY sit down not knowing whether you intend to watch movies, listen to FM, do some dubbing, or spin a CD or maybe some vinyl, and just switch between the sources, channels, and programs as all of the components run? Personally, I usually know what I intend to do before I take action...

Reminds me of three dear relatives (all male) who have cable or satellite and very large-screen televisions, or flat screen monitors, or whatever people with more time than brain cells call them. They sit down, grab the remote and some beverage that TV commercials tell them to drink, and proceed to change channels methodically, never, ever settling on one and absorbing whatever paltry cerebral nutrient might be available. The only time they do tacitly settle on one program is when the family and/or guests are eating or temporarily engaged in some conversation. This is what the concept of remotes and electronic "entertainment" has done to their brains, and their bodies are following. I do not ask my audio equipment to babysit me while I drink Diet Mountain Dew.

*Perceived personal control... Reminds me of a neurologist with whom I was talking, who said that the wife of one of his Alzheimer's patients pleaded with him, "Stop giving him those Viagras. He takes one, then I have to hide until he forgets what he took it for."

No wonder I go for my turntables 99% of the time now...

OCD, perhaps. Counted 'em to provide hard data to support my hypotheses. Please do rest assured that I won't count them again, and certainly will not memorize their functions and positions. I'm more concerned with why this kind of garbage is produced and fishing for input from ANYBODY who actually uses these "features."

And no, I never use remotes for anything. I choose my material, set my volume, sit back, and listen-- I don't fidget with silly toys. I'm just acknowledging that many on this board do indeed use volume and mute and that these are quite legitimate applications for a remote. Regarding channel-flippers, garbage in, garbage out.

Ha. Still not a single one of us that admits using even half of them on a given unit, just some possibly defensive replies that could be fueled by some sense of personal inadequacy for not having mastered all of 'em. No real defense for even twenty or thirty buttons.

I suppose many who routinely use a remote like to lay that remote next to the cell phone or Blackberry(R) so that they can be interrupted by another little multibutton electronic device, maybe even one that can take pictures and make little movies?

Gawdbless, most breasts, at least the ones I've seen, provide only one button per unit. Again, not forty or fifty. I have seen a duplicated nipple, but you've still got only an analogy to volume up, down, and mute.

Hmm... so the neurologist was feeding me an urban legend/industry joke rather than an actual (but anonymous) patient account...

Chadnliz, and anybody else who does actually use a remote, my intent was NOT to castigate anybody who uses a remote for any kind of real purpose-- My rant concerns an otherwise very intelligently-designed piece of two-channel audio gear that has a standard remote with 57 buttons, including 14 dual-function ones and four videos. If I can find anybody who has ever taken advantage of even half this number on a given remote, I will be satisfied that there is some niche of the market that actually finds this a real selling point that would tip his purchasing decision toward this device over, say, an identical unit with a rational remote that provided only the basic, useful functions. My invective is driven by my pessimism that NOBODY wants this kind of complexity and overkill in his personal life and it is being forced on us by marketers and designers who subscribe to a phenomenon known as "feature creep." The "drooling idiot" is a character that I am positive does not exist in real life excepting the imaginations of the marketers and designers, a character that they must think characterizes us. The inadequacy I am lampooning is our collective inability to memorize and utilize a 71-function remote on which the only useful buttons are quite small and will be worn out long before the majority are ever touched, except by accident. I do apologize if anybody feels personally attacked. My goal is to encourage anybody who agrees to comment about this insidious trend at point of sale in an effort to influence the marketers and designers-- That would make me happy! The style of my rant reflects the absolute sillyness of the whole subject.

Well, this one ran its course and finally reached its destination. It took a fellow Hoosier-- Timrhu-- to interpret my obsequious political aim: We don't need most of the crap being shoved down our throats, and we need to ask exactly what is being inserted when we buy new. Being the Fourth, I would defend to the death the rights of any of you to use remotes, automatic transmissions, power windows, elevators, etc., but I am also told by my wife that I am "rude" or "inconsiderate" when I merely politely question the purpose of some bill of goods being hawked to me.

Case in point: Living in central Indiana, when I tried to order our Cherokee (back in '99, still have it, I keep our cars for 15 or more years) with 2.5L four-cylinder, 5-speed, crank windows, and rear drive only, the salesman nearly went apoplectic that I wouldn't want the "power" and "convenience" packages that all of the ones on the lot had, "for resale value." I told him that I was buying a vehicle for my use, not to re-sell at a loss... now laughing as ours gets 24-28mpg... also don't need a 21-speed mountain bike...
Peace, brothers, and thanks for all of your comments. I walked in on a clearance sale at my local used record store right after they took in some old '60's collections last night and I've got a stack of 79-cent LPs to clean, including some real gems.

After a nice IPA and glass of Cab, I'm sitting back looking at what my '08 rant harvested this year... thanks to all of you who are beginning to sympathize with me after the first few personally insulted way back... Rodman, I have been operating a Guzzi big twin, pushrods, carburetors and all, for the past fifteen years here in Hoosierland, no problemo. A remote can be a useful thing, to change tracks or adjust the volume, but that's about it. Now, can we get the designers to listen to us?