I assume that your post is not a put on. I have a similiar background, at the university I managed to complete a major in musicology while getting degrees in EE and engineering physics. Here's a suggestion, since you wanted to be a conductor. Get the scores to the Beethoven or Haydn symphonies or the Mozart Operas or what ever your favorite pieces are. Then get some historic performances as well as modern ones and start listening seriously to the favorite pieces in different performances. Really get into the music and focus on what moves you. In recent years I've been doing this on a regular basis and it makes be completely forget my last system upgrade.
Recommend me a good psychologist
I used to be a happy guy with a huge passion for music, especially classical music. Music was so important in my life that I almost quit my final engineering studies (electrical) to enter to the conservatory dreaming to be one day a great orchestral conductor. I realized that it was too late to continue with that dream and decided to finish the electrical engineering. I used to enjoy so much my classical music cd’s with my 70 bucks sony discman (with megabass!) that I really did not care about the perfect sound but the perfect performance. I used to be really transported by music until I accidentally met “Mr. High-End” in Internet. That was about two years ago when I finally decided to get a “dream stereo system” with a budget of $2000 (wow!!). To make this story short, I was entrapped by “Mr. High-End” and ended with a $10000 buck system after an extensive search and auditions of components. The very sad part of this story is that I enjoyed more the music with my old cheap discman than with this high-end thing. YES, the high-end system sounds much better but now I can not concentrate in the musical message but in those terms well known in the audiophile world (soundstage, microdynamics, warm, bright, transparency, focus, image, bla bla bla…). Now I find myself buying music that is well recorded and sounds good with this system and not the music that I used to love. To be honest, I would have preferred to meet Mr. High-End NEVER. Do I need to visit to the psychologist? Whom do you recommend me?