God, I hate to ask this…


Recent conversations with the oncologist have been replete with phrases like ‘stage 4’,metastasis’ and unappealing statistics applied to survival rates. While my real and financial affairs are well settled I am most perplexed with how to approach this large pile of audio stuff e.g. 3 secondary systems in addition to the primary one, several thousand lp’s, a similar number of CD’s/SACD’s, a closet full of cable etc. I am utterly confident that I am not alone in this. While I am comfortable that my wife will love and care for my dog I am less confident that the Avantgardes will elicit such emotional investment. Although my immediate inclination is to cling desperately to these treasured objects it seems patently unfeeling to expect someone else to deal with all of this. My wife will have enough to do. I could just divest myself of much of it and depend on the collection of headphones that I began to amass during the first illness. I really don’t want to do this. I would also like to pre-bequeath much of it to friends assuming that they wanted it but all of them have been adamant in their refusal to discuss this with me and probably will remain so until the 11th hour. As childlike as it seems, I am emotionally invested in these fruits of a lifelong passion and want them to end up where they will be respected and loved . This seems to be a juncture that we will all come to. I would be grateful to hear the contemplations that all you have had in this, admittedly, sobering matter. 
To all of you, good cheer and good health.

 

williamjohnston

Showing 1 response by pindac

@williamjohnston Your've got to the time in your life, where the very well established patterns are now fragile and maintenance of regular interests are quite possible as being not as important to be maintained.

Your openness on this matter is not the usual, and responding to such a openness is not a daily occurrence for myself. 

There is the sense that there is a growing need to Finalise Personal Affairs and if one feels the need to include items used to support their Hobby of listening to recorded music as an area to be included in the action of tidying things up, the intensity of how much is put into it is down to the individual.

For what it's worth, in the past few years, I have bought Audio Equipment from two recent widowed individuals only as purchases made to help out.

l purchased with what I deemed to be a full sensitivity towards the Seller, i.e, not making stupid dealer offers and also sharing with the widower experiences in audio which they seemingly related to and were seemingly contented with hearing.

I do believe the meeting had positives, and the widower was glad to have the encounter. 

Having a selection of items remaining for the family to deal with as your estate, where they are fully aware of the asking price to be a fair sale, might assist them with processing their loss, when they get to the place, the items left are now able to be let go.