Howie, I have a lot more experience as an audiophile and music lover than as a dealer. I've been the former for thirty two years, the latter for two or three. Having been to many dealers across the country as well as in my own area (Chicago), I've seen and heard just about every approach and lots of esoteric gear. Not having any previous experience in retail, maybe I tend to be much more of an audiophile than a dealer. My good experiences with dealers have been with those who put love of music and audio first.
Please excuse the pitch but here goes. The customer has the privilege of auditioning something I sell in his home without obligation. If he chooses to skip that step and proceed with the purchase, that's also his privilege. If he auditions the piece in his home and buys something else, that's fine, at least he gave it a try and he can always come back and can expect the same respect, straightforward advice, and home auditioning privileges, as well as a fair deal. Conference calls aren't the right way to do things as far as I'm concerned because they don't respect people's privacy and personal decision making. Likewise, you can't necessarily rely on Internet discussion posts, especially on sites where you can't tell who's who and what their interests may be.
Brian