Can you help or do I have to get divorced?

This is a no brainer, keep your wife. She probably wants her things done and if you accomplish her tasks first, she'll probably compromise on yours.

Another angle. Take her speaker shopping. Tell her we need good sound and good looks. She may become hooked on a great sounding and handsome speaker that is afordable...and she'll have helped pick it out...no, don't let her near the bose display....good luck

Does your wife enjoy music? Who are her favorite artists? If the answer to the first question is "no" then you know what to do. If it is "yes" then get what you want. Get all of her favorite music and let hear listen to it for a week or two. She will want the audio equipment as much (if not more than) you do. It worked for me. My wife and I now enjoy my(our)system together and often. She has her set of music and I have mine. It works out pretty well. We now disagree on what to listen to but not on the equipment. She hears better than I do and now loves the big floor standers.

Do what I did: Buy a pair of Cabasse Atlantis speakers. They are 8 ft. tall and look like Star Wars jet fighters with huge eyeballs protruding from the center. After having those in the family room, ANY other speaker has seemed small in comparison. Now, my wife doesn't flinch over Magnepans and Soundlabs!

Seriously, try a pair of Paradigm Reference monitors.
Small speakers for about $550 shouldn't sound this good.