I am looking for an accurate sounding subwoofer that will blend gently into my system and not be so noticed
Bear in mind that your ears are far more sensitive at 80Hz than at 20 Hz. 100 Decibels at 10 Hz is barely audible....a mere 30 decibels is audible at 80 Hz!!!
Ideally this requires a subwoofer with EXTREMELY low distortion figures or else you will hear added harmonics or noise in the 80Hz to 120Hz range! (although some will be very satisfied with their purchase when hearing all this overwhelming bass distortion, which confirms the presence of a new subwoofer)
Here is a guideline; distortion will not be audible if the second-order distortion is below 3%, the third-order around 1% and the higher harmonics are around 0.2%. These specs are gruelling and rarely, if ever, achieved in subwoofers! Your should be looking for THD+N of less than 1% at rated output!
With help from Telarc Corporation, Dolby labs tested 12 commercial subwoofers and published their results (no names were given). They concluded that none of the subwoofers tested was able to meet the distortion and noise criteria required over the frequency range from 12 to 100 Hz. (Psychoacoustic data was used to define audible distortion and noise levels) Here is the reference for the paper; JAES Volume 36 Number 6 pp. 443-456; June 1988 "Subwoofer Performance for Accurate Reproduction of Music".
If you seriouly expect similar audiophile quality as your main speakers than I would plan to spend at least as much as your main speakers on a subwoofer, spending a lot more won't hurt either!