How loud is too loud


Hi. Im new to the world of audiophile and am hoping someone can help with a problem only nine months in to spending £3000  on my set up. I've got an audiolab 8200p power amp, audiolab 8300cd and monitor audio silver 8 speakers. After playing some fairly heavy house music at -10db I noticed a distinct lack in sound quality when I played music at a lower volume and now it sounds as if I've lost a whole frequency level. There is not distortion as such, it's just that music sounds quieter and less definition in the top end. I always run my system in before turning up the volume and never push it too hard for too long. Normal listening level is around -30db.
Any suggestions greatly appreciated.
tcapone
Fletcher-Munson effect! Human hearing has reduced sensitivity to low and high frequency sounds as volume is reduced! Older receivers and integrated amps had a switch to compensate for this by boosting the bass and treble. This allowed quiet listening to sound more natural! Same thing can be done with tone controls/equalizer. Nothing wrong with your system!
I appreciate that my ears may not be as receptive to sound clarity immediately after turning the volume down after listening to loud music but the loss of sound quality is apparent for days after. I have been testing it with electronic dance music, starting off at low volumes building up to -30db, it starts off ok but then it is as if certain frequencies trip the system and I loose depth and loudness in the sound??
Great question;

There are cell apps that record DB for you.

I have a audio group & they all play at different levels.

My ears like softer

When reading & listening -60-65 dB
When really listening - 75-80 dB

One buddy -90-94 dB 

most others -80-85db

yes, I’m geeky